Supra Wondering

2011-09-20T03:26:00.000-07:00

As we grow up, we meet people and as we move on, roles of various people in our life flips, renewed or totally removed. people who just abhor an unstable mind like me often lands into dilemma who exactly is worth looking for when you face problems, or simply when you need someone just to listen you, and it feels like so many times you are there for people who need you, that you forget what it is like to have someone be there for you. Then you realize that everyone who walks into your life make you smile, some when they walk in and some when they walk out. We come across some sweet moments and some strangers to remember and ahead in this journey one day when you try to recall, the moments are memories and the strangers are gone. The moment you get attached to things you screw it up! The challenge of life is to appreciate everything and attach yourself to nothing.

There are people around us, who timely keep assuring us how much they like us and how ridiculous their life would turn without us. But is it as reliable and as easy to digest as cakes piece? As far as my perception is concerned, I guess it’s only the change which is permanent and it is seriously being stupid to stay confident when someone tells they like you, though it is one of the best feel, because the question which arises is, “Until when”? Just like seasons, feelings change and so does the people. Be it temporarily or permanently, it completely depends on person to person. Yes, and everyone is selfish. I include myself too. We usually tend to change our behavior when we see the other person is changing. You cannot plan for others and others don't necessarily fall into your plan either and that's alright. At the end, time let you know who stays and who don't because as the life moves on, the better shall come and the memories of old good friends are cherished.

Ah!

2011-08-03T09:35:00.000-07:00

You know you’ve grown when you don’t know where to hide your face while going through some old diary entries and posts!

Oh well, but that's life!

2011-07-17T11:50:00.000-07:00

Sometimes when somebody pops up out of the blue and makes you feel good and helps you to come over something, you're in for a surprise and slowly you start expecting that out of the person every time. It's like that becomes his job - to make you feel better when you're down in the dumps. You feel like he did it last time, he'll do it again now. In fact, he'll do it at all times. And just when you start liking it, it stops.

Nobody stays in your life forever. So, stop expecting that in the first place. With time, you will grow over some people, some people will grow over you, it’s like that. All this “forever” business - its bullshit. Best thing about this is, you know you have limited time with everybody who enters your life so guess you should make the best of it and be around those who make you happy. Trying to make something happen with someone who makes you anything less than happy is a waste of precious precious time. I'm still coming to terms with that.

2011-07-17T11:46:00.000-07:00

Someday someone will walk into your life and make you realise why it never worked out with anyone else :)

At the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody. So this thing where we all keep our distance and pretend not to care about each other, it's usually a load of bull. So we pick and choose who we want to remain close to, and once we've chosen those people, we tend to stick close by. No matter how much we hurt them. The people that are still with you at the end of the day, those are the ones worth keeping. And sure, sometimes close can be too close. But sometimes, that invasion of personal space, it can be exactly what you need.

We spend our whole lives worrying about the future, planning for the future, trying to predict the future, as if figuring it out will cushion the blow. But the future is always changing. The future is the home of our deepest fears and wildest hopes. But one thing is certain when it finally reveals itself. The future is never the way we imagined it.

Fit yourself in a teapot.Warm and comfortable

2010-09-15T10:53:00.001-07:00

Life is beautiful. There will be noise and there will be a crowd. There will be trash and there will be a strong stink. You'll sit through a room full of people who are screaming at each other. The noise will blind your ears. And to shove away the hurt, you will munch on things. It'll all collect into one big ball of garbage and make you feel sick within.

I still think Life is beautiful.

I was on a long lone walk and I thought of it. I smiled.

The last time I saw a shooting star for real, I was too engrossed gaping at the beauty of it. When beautiful things happen to you, you are awestruck. Your mind is in a daze. You don't count them beautiful happenings on your fingers. And then very conveniently complain about how your life is a mess without any beautiful things happening.

Buffet Says

2010-05-06T09:04:00.000-07:00

These are my favorite quotes made by the great Warren Buffet…
..and I am not good enough to explain or comment on any one of those…

Wide diversification is only required when investors do not understand what they are doing.

Buy something that you’d be perfectly happy to hold if the market shut down for 10 years.

We simply attempt to be fearful when others are greedy and to be greedy only when others are fearful.

Why not invest your assets in the companies you really like? As Mae West said, “Too much of a good thing can be wonderful”.

Your premium brand had better be delivering something special, or it’s not going to get the business.

Our favourite holding period is forever.

Irked!

2010-02-21T21:59:00.001-08:00

I am getting increasingly irritated by the minute. I wish people around me could get over their own inconsequential lives and stop bringing their negativity into the lives of others. I am beyond the point where I can offer empty consolation and sugar-coated words just to seem 'nice'. I am tired of people who sulk around all day thinking about their own humongously huge issues and 'problems' and spoil life for EVERY body. Just suck it in and continue to do what you have to do; THAT is where the strength lies, not in pretending defiance at the mere hint of another trying to make light the situation, which they probably are doing to make YOU feel better and realize how infinitesimal and pointless your gargantuan 'issues' are.

The Flaws of life..

2009-12-14T07:49:00.000-08:00

So I found this article. Please read, comment and enjoy:

Damn, is our society flawed or what? You don't believe me? You think it's fine? Well, you've obviously been brainwashed by all of these so-called "public officials." Yes, they say they're doing the right thing. They say to follow them in their example. The wrong things are encouraged by them. Think about it. Anti-creativity and anti-individualism run rampant. Today's society is all about conformity, conformity, conformity. What if I don't want to conform? Then I'm a bad person. I deserve punishment. I'm going to hell. Why? Because we're not allowed to have our own point of view.

Again, think about it. In our presidential election, who gets the final say? The electoral college. The third arm of the government. Why can't the election just be based on the popular vote? Well apparently we can't be trusted to make the right decision. Apparently, us people will treat it more like a popularity contest rather than a political election. But my biggest question is, how do they know that? It's simple really. They were the hovering parent, making sure we turned out the way they wanted us to be. That is, as weak as possible so they can keep their power and make all of our decisions for us. Sure, right now I probably sound like some crazy conspiracy theorist. But that's my opinion.

That's right, MY opinion. No outside influences here. Believe it or not, I developed my own sense of belonging, my own sense of self, my own sense of identity. There are definitely others like me. There are definitely others who believe that what society is doing is wrong. Think about the order of importance in society. A great example is society's most powerful tool, school.

Schools are powerful, relentless, and malicious. From a young age, we are suckered into the trap that is nearly impossible to escape from. Some of the values impressed upon us are rational. For example, no bullying. That makes some sense. However, if you are being bullied, go to a teacher. God forbid we try and work it out ourselves. We're too weak and dumb to do that. Instead, we are taught to rely on others to solve our problems for us. And this starts at a very young age, around 4-5 years old. We aren't taught the necessary problem solving skills for real life. If we had been taught, then society's officers would lose control and free-thinking would result. Oh No! We can't have that! But not only do schools teach you how to depend on others, they also place the most value on the least important subjects. Music, art, and theater aren't encouraged. Math, science, and history are valued more. Would you like to know why? It's because there's no individualism involved in any of those subjects. History happened already so how can one be able to identify with it. Math is only numbers and equations. We can't compare ourselves to equations. The complexity would just lead to more ineptitude. As for science, it has theories and hypotheses, but no place for creativity. Science criticizes the fun in an experiment. Art however gives one the ability to express their individualism. We can't have that. We can't have people going around with their own opinions. We can't lose control. Why not? I honestly see no valid reason.

That's because there is no reasoning with society. There is only listening to it and obeying it. However, if a public official were to see this, he would dismiss this passage as frivolous. A passage which cannot be substantiated when in fact, it can be. just read all of the above dummy, and then tell me that this cannot be substantiated. But, being as stubborn as all public officials are he would still start an expensive campaign against my passage and succeed too. Not only succeed in excommunicating me and my passage from the flawed society, but also succeeding in further brainwashing all of you poor people.

That's right, you're all just a bunch of poor souls. You need someone to keep you alive, rather than doing it yourself. You need one of these public officials to formulate an opinion for you. You poor souls. You don't have the ability to stand up. You can't even crawl. You're the infant who can do nothing but roll around on your stomach while your parent guides you in THEIR desired direction. Sure, they attempt to keep you from danger, usually doing a poor job. However, what about YOUR wants. You see, they don't matter. Society tells you that you don't matter, and eventually, you begin to believe it.

But, YOU DO MATTER. Why the hell can't you see that? Society has blinded you with the pepper spray of ignorance. You're eyes are being challenged by society. With such conflicted eyesight, you have no choice but to trust society. You obey society with high hopes that you are going to be guided in the right direction. Maybe you are, but what matters is that there are many times where you aren't.

My point, my dear friends, is that society, and all of its pawns (i.e. presidents, governors, mayors, officers of the law) are a bunch of power hungry fools. My hope is that after reading my passage, society's pepper spray where begin to fade. The blindfold will be removed. Society can be fixed. Not by its pawns, but by its victims. The reason people aren't trusted is because they are raised to mess up; but not anymore. We as humans should prove to society that we won't keep quiet. We won't sit back and take all of these lies. We will rise up and fix it, no matter how unwilling it is to cooperate. I wish you good luck in your endeavors. You can succeed, you must succeed, you will succeed. Godspeed...

-Mr. N. Anonymous

Pretty crazy huh? I think Mr. anonymous has a point though. What do you guys think?

Because they do!

2009-12-05T06:10:00.001-08:00

Mouth: Take a look at yourself in a mirror who do you see looking back?
Haley: Is it the person you want to be?
Dan: Or is there someone else you were meant to be the person you were meant to be but fell short of?
Mia: Is someone telling you you can’t or won’t? Because you can.
Chase: Believe that love is out there.
Nathan: Believe that dreams come true every day. Because they do.
Peyton: Sometimes happiness doesn’t come from money or fame or power. Sometimes happiness comes from good friends and family and the quiet nobility of leading a good life.
Julian: Believe that dreams come true every day. Because they do.
Brooke: Believe that dreams come true every day. Because they do.
Peyton: So take a look in that mirror and remind yourself to be happy because you deserve to be. Believe that.
Lucas: And believe that dreams come true every day. Because they do.

That's from One Tree Hill, and I'm just putting it up here, so I can keep reminding myself.
Everytime I complain and rant and cry.
Everytime I'm so swamped with work I can barely breathe, and everytime I have a bad day. I'm going to read this and remind myself that its all true.

Dreams do come true, we all know that, we just lose sight of it.

I'm living mine, and I know it.
But a reminder every now and then wouldn't hurt, will it? = )

Someday i'll get there!

2009-11-03T05:20:00.000-08:00

Are there levels of dissapointment? Sometimes people just generally fail to live up to your expectations. And sometimes, betray, lies and dissapoint, I know.But what about the time when there is no coming back from it? Like all the trust, respect and love you had for the person looks so minute and meagre when weighed against the dissapointment? Can you ever get over it? 'To forgive is divine' they say. But can there be a time when it's not in your capacity to forgive anymore? What if I have to shut things/people out in order to grow, in order to shun something I've been so used to, because it's doing nothing but sucking the life out of you?

Sigh. I hate change. How do I get over something I've been so used to? Somehow I had made peace with the regular dissapointments. But there is a line you just don't cross, right? You have to stop letting yourself be used and stop throwing yourself out there somehow, no matter how strong it needs you to be. Argh. I need strength. Anyone selling any?

One Day....

2009-11-01T01:41:00.001-07:00

I will write a book.

Where??

2009-10-04T23:38:00.000-07:00

School, college, job, retire, die.
This isn't life, this isn't anywhere close.
You study, you get your marks, get into a good college, get a good job, you earn a lot. Okay, so that's one goal achieved - financial independence and stability.
But, is that all some people look forward to in life? Okay, so you got the money, now what're you going to do with it?

What do we look forward to in life? I know that everyone doesn't look only at money, or money at all for that matter. There's so much more to life than that.. And just because these things aren't practical or "won't fill your stomach when you're on your own", doesn't make them irrelevant.

I look forward to the oddest things, very diverse things..

Marriage, you have no idea how much I love the concept of marriage or how beautiful I think it is. I know most people don't really have a good marriage but that doesn't seem to discourage me. I know there's no assurance that a marriage has to work, but it's amazing the things people do to make it work. No, trying to make a marriage work doesn't mean that it's not meant to be that's why you're forced to make an effort. It means that when things aren't going too well and it's easy to want out, you love someone so much, that you'll do whatever you can from your side to keep your relationship working. It's not just about being in love, it's about being so much in love, that you will eliminate anything that comes in the way of you and the one you love. I can't really explain, but I'm really looking forward to marriage.. :)

Parenting. Whenever I observe something about the way I'm being raised or the person I am, I never fail to think about how my kid'll be, how I'll raise my kid.. Every mistake I've made, every mistake I've seen, everything I've learned in life.. I want to use them to learn how to be a good parent, how to raise a child to be a human being. No, I don't want my child to be perfect. I want my child to be happy, carefree, and balanced.. I want to give my child the best childhood I can provide him/her.. I will love my kids unconditionally, and hope that they live happy and healthy lives knowing that I'll support them and be there for them no matter what. I want to be a better person even today, just so that I can set a better example for my kids and provide them with a more stable and balanced environment. It's weird coming from a teenager, but it's just one of those things.

Travel. I've always wanted to travel the world [and yes, I know I need money to do it, but that's not what I'm focusing on here]. There's just so much to see, so much to learn, and so much to experience out there.. There're billions of people on this planet who live what in their perception is a "normal life in a normal place". But they have no idea how diverse each one's life is, how diverse their country/city, or culture is. To be able to see all of it, or at least as much as I can, is a dream of mine. I want to write, do photography, art, read, listen to different kinds of music, ALL alongside my travel. I wanna discover the world, and myself, together.

Ah, anyway, at the moment I'm just your normal teenager living a slightly abnormal but fun life. But hey, I don't want to worry too much about the future that I forget to see the magic in this part of life, eh? :) I'll go now.
Just want leave you with a thought.. what do you look forward to in life?

Take care you dreamers!

Turning Virtuality into Reality

2009-09-21T08:10:00.000-07:00

This is a topic that has been on my mind ever since I started blogging.

The reasons internet became a sudden rage were very obvious: Information was no longer a rare commodity. It was available a click away. It appealed to all the masses because of the variety of things it had on offer.. There was a little some thing for every one. It was as if, internet had become a world of its own! People started calling it the virtual world. The virtual proximity people enjoyed was infectious.

You could chat with anyone in the world, without having to reveal your true identity or even show your real face/name. A certain amount of anonymity was associated with whatever you did on the internet. You could visit any site, do anything on the internet and no one would every know! (At least that is how it was back then when Internet was an infant)

All of this gave a certain sense of freedom to all and sundry. The introverted types could remain on the background and still make friends in the plethora of chat rooms! People started developing mixed personalities – people that they were in “real” life and what they wanted to be/were in the “virtual” world. It gave wings to the birds dying to fly out and explore the world. Something within them or around them prevented them from doing so in the real life… but in the virtual life, there was no stopping… no inhibitions whatsoever…

And then came blogging. People started blogging – about their lives… about everything they felt about! Blogs soon turned into an online digital diary, where one could write what they wanted without being penalised for the same. It also came with the advantage of regular readers/blogger friends one would make during the course of blogging. It is not surprising for like minded people to come together and form a blogger-friend circle.

I know many people who also met up with their blogger friends. There was no discomfort, since they already knew each other through their blogs! Maybe even better than their “real” close friends. The virtuality that surrounded the internet, was slowly fading into reality. People started getting obssessed with their blogs and maybe sometimes even ignoring their old friends (people they actually knew) or families, because their minds would be preoccupied with their blogs and blogging friends. Now, all this is not bad. But definitely has the potential of going out of control. Anything that has good aspects attached to it, also comes with the other side of the same coin.

While I have known people who got married to people they met on a chat room, internet has also ruined many a lives.

So much freedom could mean just one thing: this was soon to turn into aFrankenstein. There were numerous criminal incidents reported on the ugly side of internet. The pictures people innocently posted on the web started being published in nude forms else where. There were also many incidents of internet-arranged blind dates turning ugly.

So, my dear readers, please enjoy the freedom that comes along with being on the internet, but be sure not to abuse it nor to put yourself in a soft spot, where you make yourself vulnerable to any kind of threat!

Finally, I guess, it is about being in touch with your inner self and being true to who you are. Once you have that inner reality check on all the time and with a little bit of vigilance on your side, I am sure you will be able to thwart any monster that comes your way!

Explanation is the worst form of offence

2009-09-21T07:41:00.000-07:00

Those who know you will never need it and those who do, do not understand you so in that case they don’t deserve it. Something of this sort I’d read somewhere. True I say, it’s very much true.

Note: There is a thin line between reason and explanation and sadly some don’t know it

Reason is the logic behind an action.

Explanation is the justification for any action.

LIFE!!>>

2009-08-26T09:41:00.000-07:00

About how innocence in the world today is really lost.
We knew long back that innocence in thought had been long lost, innocence in actions too.

But the fact which startles me is how we've even lost innocence in feelings.
About how there is no innocence left even in any emotion we experience.

No innocence in the feeling of happiness. If we're very honest to ourselves, we'll think to find that they're have been very few moments in the 'non-childhood' part of our lives where happiness has not been accompanied by a hint of pride or ego.

No innocence in the feeling of sadness without the disgust and jealousy, mostly because of happiness being experienced by some one else at that point.

No innocence in the objective of thought. No one thinks without a motive. How often to we just sit and think, just for the sake of it?

No innocence in the feeling of ambition without that portion of selfishness , superiority.

No innocence in the feeling of faith, devotion without that part of impatience, weakness or fear.

No innocence in the feeling of love without that pinch of insecurity and frustration.

.. Maybe all this has always been realities of adult life, have always been the side effects of the society our fore fathers have built. Succumbing to this is very simple, fighting it exponentially hard. But in whatever little way i can, i shall try and hold on to that school uniform, my window seat in the bus, that dance in the rain to retain that innocence. In the smallest way possible.

"Don't care what people say,
Just follow your own way,
Don't give up and use the chance,
To return to innocence"

Swim or Drown

2009-05-04T03:45:00.000-07:00

When you're standing on the edge you don't look down, until you're ready and willing to fly.

Bon Jovi says it RIGHT.

Unfortunately for most of us, life doesn't care if we're ready, it just pushes us off the cliff and expects us to fly. Some learn the beauty of flying and the joy it brings, while others, learn about the long and scary path life takes you through while falling into the darkness below.

When I was 8, my mother pushed me into the deep end of the pool because I was too scared to go in by myself.
I began moving frantically, to prevent myself from - what I thought at that time - drowning. Anyway, that eventually helped me learn to swim.

Now, see.. all I'm saying is, I'm 18.
And whether I'm ready or not, life's going to make me jump, flying or swimming is upto me, and only me. I get that. Most people need that push to make something of themselves or they'll fall into what we call a monotonous life.

Why don't most people consider floating? Don't need to swim, or drown, just.. float and stare at those beautiful stars?
After all, only those who float will have time to THINK.
The others? They'll either be too busy trying to get ahead, or stop themselves from well, dying.
Why does everything we do have to be forced?
Why can't we sometimes take the less traveled path?
Why is it so difficult for us to just wait, wait until something inside us tells us we're ready?

When you're ready, and trained and well, sure of yourself and what you hope you'll make of future, then, only then will you be able to find the balance between swimming and floating. Right?

Why does everything have to be a certain way. Why is it college immediately after school? Or a job after you've finished studying.
Why marriage just when you're stable?

Why not do something YOUR own way.
Leave your own footprint. Show the world that taking a risk CAN pay off.
I'm sure it will, 'cause if not anything else, you'll be appreciated for the courage you had in TAKING that risk.

So, I ask you again..
Is it so bad to do something different RATHER than doing the same things differently?

What Now?

2009-04-19T10:24:00.000-07:00

The only people who made life seem worth it are well, gone.
The only people left, will be left behind, soon enough.
In life, there's friends, family and love. Three things worth living for.
I have friends, well, some.
I have a family.
So I have things to live for.

Then there's college.
If that doesn't happen, what next?

When you have things to live for, but nothing to make it worth it..
What next?

What happens if you have reasons to live, but no will too?

What then?

Disclaimer: No, I am not suicidal, I've just been watching too much One Tree Hill.

Perspectives

2009-04-11T03:53:00.000-07:00

Adults often train themselves to think in ways that favor them. Instead of rotating thoughts, ideas and opinions through 360 degrees, they fix them at an angle and refuse to twist them. Gradually, everything starts to enter a region of grey, and it reaches a point where it’s hard to separate good from bad, right from wrong, and black from white.

I guess my point is that as one make our transitions into adulthood, it is important to open up to perspectives. One is often ingrained with opinions about people and ideologies, and it can never hurt to switch shoes and re-evaluate them.

I didn’t mean this to be a motivational post, I promise. All I wanted to get across is that the world is full of perspectives, and if only we loosen up, we’ll start to enjoy the 360 degree view.

Here’s a video on perspectives, courtesy a friend.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42E2fAWM6rA&eurl=http%3A%2F%2Ftheshootingstar.wordpress.com%2F&feature=player_embedded

If you aren’t wowed yet, watch it again. The words, when read forward paint a picture of negativity. The same words, when read in reverse, do just the opposite. It’s a brilliant, applaudable piece!

2009-04-11T03:38:00.000-07:00

Since I've been at a loss for words and this is what it is it is it is.....

Honest opinion

2009-03-17T14:31:00.000-07:00

There is something new that I learned today.

To give an honest opinion in today’s world is SO last century, its not even funny or tragic. As a certain Mr Shaw rather correctly put it, when people ask for opinions, all they want is praise.

6 Things You Can Learn From Dev D

2009-02-10T00:25:00.000-08:00

Was generally on the internet when I came across this. It was a movie review of Dev D. And it ended with the 6 things one can learn from Dev D (http://thenewsdose.com/2009/02/06/dev-d-movie-review/).
6 Things You Can Learn From Dev.D
1. A very little communication gap is enough to kill a relationship
2. Never let your ego come in between your relationship.
3. Don’t drink, smoke and never do drugs.
4. Learn to move on and never let go the new girl because of a previous girl who is someone with else now.
5. Learn to manage your money.
6. And the most important, never call your dad with his name, say “Papa” or “Dad”

Wonder how many of us have thought about some of these things. Doesn’t take a Dev D to teach us some of them I guess, but to put them across in a blog is altogether a different issue. If nothing else, that was an interesting way to end a review. Background score that hits you every time it plays! The photography is so good that it manages to induce a heady feeling, and you come out of the theatre on a high. Just go and watch this film to realise (and acknowledge) that films can be political, sensitive and yet score highly on entertainment value.

Every film leaves an imprint, evokes some emotion. But his one left none. And that is what makes this film special. Anurag Kashyap has freed the spirit of Devdas from its fossils. It has managed to break free of the shackles of sentimentality that had kept it bound for ages. Instead of being mere cardboard cutouts (as they were, in the previous versions) Kashyap’s Chanda and Paro, are made of flesh and blood.

Kashyap’s Dev D is intensely political, played out like a Brechtian drama, and yet at some level managed to capture the changing emotional topography of a rapidly changing psychological landscape. Unlike a tragedy from the classical mould, the protagonist is not a victim of circumstances; rather, he is caught in the structures he has created for himself. Thus the film is devoid of any emotion of sympathy for any of the characters. Although, Chanda does have a rather sad past, her actions too, are of her own accord, and by her own admission she seems to be content with the dual life that she leads. In a sense, Chanda exemplifies the Kashyap’s philosophy. In this overtly existential film, the characters are responsible for their own actions, and there is no sense of regret or revenge. Even Dev’s descent has little to do with unfulfilled love. Rather it is a tale of a protagonist trying to forge/find an identity for himself.

Overall, a different off-beat movie but definitely one after sometime you wish it would just end, which isn't a good sign for any movie. One positive thing to come out of this movie is for the company Smirnoff Vodka. It has been advertised so heavily that it owes a debt to Anurag Kashyap. Well, one never knows, Smirnoff might have been the corporate partner for it.

Pretense and unfounded hopes!

2009-02-09T01:14:00.001-08:00

One thing life teaches you at least my life does, is to be always your politically correct self. Selfishness rides high, people use you and then throw you and then pick you up again... its disgusting makes me puke, how is it that you forget all your differences, a full blown verbal cross fire, where the expletives keep bouncing off. And then you behave like the best of friends. I don't advocate holding on to grudges or anything but the sheer caprice of the soul and the mind and the conviction with which people lie and fake emotions of bonhomie...of really feeling for you, being there for you, really being part of your happiness, it makes me cringe. I for one have stopped sharing most of my joys and sorrows with people except for a few who genuinely don't like seeing my sullen face...can see through my act of being unruffled by my milieu. Why does life make us this way? Or at least why am I this way? For frankly I've been the goody two shoes as well, although most get to know my hostility through way too obvious symptoms; like giving them a royal ignore, keeping to myself, not being my usual bright and sundry self with them. And what confounds me more is when people don't see the make up peeling off right in front of them, it disgusts me... Well anyway it’s none of my concern and I guess everybody had their right to their own fair share of wrong judgments. I cannot be the cloyingly sweet sycophant, unless I genuinely mean those compliments, although some are left blushing after that... Haha I too am way too generous with my compliments... but in life you can never be sure of things, you never can claim to know a person inside out, never be sure that the person's never going to hurt you. But saw it happening today. And I never in my life would want to go out of my way to do anything for them never ever. I don't want to expect or live upto expectations or be too vocal about my sentiments especially the ones if not reciprocated will hurt me. I don't want to live on false hopes either but life being the eternal bitch never lets you be...

Slumdog Millionaire - What's the fuss all about?

2009-01-26T08:35:00.000-08:00

I know of a bird called ‘Ostrich’. It has thin long legs as strong as iron rods and though it is a bird who cannot fly, its strong legs take it to speeds in excess of 40 miles per hour (70 kph) making it the fastest creature on two legs. Amazing bird you’d say, Isn't it? Despite its restricted ability to fly, it has managed to develop an effective alternate method of mobility.

But this Ostrich has a rather peculiar trait. When cornered, it digs a hole in the sand and hides its head therein assuming that since it cannot see its enemy, it is safe. Though the bird is Australian, the traits are definitely Indian. At least that is what it seems from the uproar over Slumdog Millionaire.

Could somebody please tell me, what is the outrage all about? I saw a beautiful movie – A movie about the resilience of India; a story of a chap who is born in the slums but doesn’t remain there; a journey of a boy named Jamal Malik from the streets to the hot seat on the show – Who wants to be a Millionaire, a film about character and the never give up attitude of an Indian, which in fact was very heartening. To ignore all of this and get stuck on the portrayal of the part of India which is, though very ugly, but definitely not imaginary, represents the same trait of denial possessed by the bird I was talking about.

Who is to blame?

Who are we actually pissed of on? Or Who should we be pissed off upon? Danny Boyle for telling the truth (with of course certain cinematic liberties, on which I shall return) or on ourselves as a country who allows this to happen. We cannot, by refusing to acknowledge these truths, make any progress to solving them. Just because this director happens to be a non-Indian doesn’t make any of this a lesser truth. I am wondering why there wasn’t any uproar when our own Madhur Bhandarkar made ‘Traffic Signal’. It had all of this and some more – Slum lords, beggars, corrupt officials, pervert donors touching little girl beggars inappropriately, prostitutes, roadside gigolos and even gay whores. Is this your India? Or maybe, it is alright if the movie doesn’t get popular enough to go International; what happens here stays here.

A lot of people will try to pull you down once you attain the ultimate triumph. There will surely be detractors along with the appreciators. That’s exactly is something happening to Slumdog Millionaire. Not surprisingly the most of those detractors are our fellow-countrymen/women whereas West has embraced Danny Boyle’s version of India like never before. Even Mira Nair could not create the hysteria with her Salaam Bombay back in late 80s what Slumdog Millionaire has done in last couple of months since it’s release in select theaters of Northern America.

Amitabh Bachchan cannot fathom what the fuss all about Slumdog Millionaire is and mentions in his blog that Mumbai was shown in disgraceful manner. Few of our own makers here have shown their anger by saying that Slumdog Millionaire is a "generic western movie about India". I say what the fuck? First of all treat a movie as a movie. If Danny decides to make a movie based on a book written by an Indian (Q & A by Vikas Swarup; who himself says that he has his approval stamp) then I do not see any reason to malign him and the hard work of those associated with the movie. If it’s badly scripted/directed, if editing and actors suck then open your big mouth and rant as much as you can. But no way demean any movie based on how real/unreal it is. Is that the basis to judge a fictional piece anyways?

Mr. Bachchan played a character (Sexy Sam) well in his mid-fifties or something romancing and shaking his booty with girls half his age. K-Jo and Ekta promote infidelity at the drop of the hat and RGV doesn’t go beyond underworld stories where murder and rapes are child’s play? So, all that is acceptable and slums of Mumbai aren’t. A film-maker has all the liberty to make what he wants to and how does he/she wants to.

When someone mocks you for having bad breath inspite of appearing smart and well groomed, what do you do? Kick his a*** for saying something derogatory about you or pick up a mouth wash?

Clichés and Stereotypes – All pervasive:

Agreed, there is a stupid cliché in the movie where the foreign tourist says "Here’s a picture of Real America" (I thought for a moment that she’ll pull out a missile from her bag and bomb the poor kid alleging him to be a member of Al Qaida), I really found it amusing more than anything else. I mean come on, all our lives, we’ve lived of such West bashing or even PAK bashing stereotypes all through bollywood (All westerners are infidels, they want sex before marriage, loose character buggers, buffoons in cargo shorts at tourist spots, dumb idiots, racist and at the same time, all Pakistanis are uneducated gun totting radical members of one or the other terrorist club; why just recently, our very own Big B gave a huge lecture to the racist father of a white girl who his son wanted to marry – can’t really remember the film) And now, when the joke is on you, this one sentence hurts you inside out? I wonder what America would do if they saw ‘Hello’ or heard Asharam Bapu’s discourse on the acute problem of constipation in America. (Especially for those who haven’t seen Hello, it is a movie which teaches you 35=10. Confused? They go on to explain that the average intelligence of a 35 year old American is equal to a 10 year old Indian. And further, they show Americans calling call centers in India with such dumb questions that would put an asylum to shame. Does that mean most Americans are stupid? And it doesn’t stop there. By the end of the movie, Indian call center employees have managed to create a big virus scare in America which results in their calls reaching record volumes. Funny, is it? Or now you’ve suddenly understood what stereotypes mean)

Clichés and stereotypes, though not always 100% right, are often used by film makers to get the point across and this is definitely not something that we aren’t guilty about.

Cinematic Liberties – Heard about them?

Talking about cinematic liberties, I definitely haven’t seen a boy hanging from the roof top of a train stealing food from passengers and then being pulled down to fall of the train. But I definitely have seen kids been beaten up for stealing. That’s what is called cinematic liberty. Getting offended by this is as good as getting offended by why do all policemen in India have such a poor shooting aim? They never hit the bad guy or the hero, whomsoever they are chasing.

Bhandarkar made Page 3, Corporate, Traffic Signal and we acknowledged him by giving National Award every time. I am not saying adorn Danny with National Award, but give him and his movie a fair chance. Some of the French/Iranian/Korean movies which I see are upsetting to the core you feel disgusted later; not because they are badly written or shot but because they fucking tell the story in such a moving way you cannot but be in awe. No one complains. Most of them go to win the awards. So, why is there so much of fuss in India? Is it because a foreigner made it? Oh come on, I know we have few makers here who are better than Danny by leaps and bounds. Nonetheless Danny has made this movie and we better accept it the way it is. After all, it’s just a movie.

One-sided – You say?

A lot of people resent as to why was only the dirty part of India shown in the movie. Why wasn’t a single Indian shown as compassionate? I’d say what? I mean there were people in his call centre which were nice to him. But nevertheless, that’s not the point. The story was about the problems he faces, his trials which he goes through all alone. The director was trying to put the point across and he didn’t want to waste time in unnecessary sweetening of the plot. That is his prerogative. I mean, when you see Hollywood flicks where blacks carry guns and shoot randomly or American soldiers raping girls in Iraq or chopping their own comrades after getting drunk (even this one got an Oscar by the way), does it imply that that’s all American soldiers do?

Everyone is saying that it is a rags-to-riches story of a slum boy from Mumbai. I would not say that. Rags-to-riches stories are those where the sheer hard work or the plain luck (by chance) get you the moolah. No doubt Jamal Malik (Dev Patel) is playing ‘Who wants to be a Millionaire’ but he is not playing to win the money. He is playing hoping his beloved Latika (Freida Pinto) would be watching the show. And indeed she was. The movie in actuality is a love story than a rags-to-riches story by participating in a reality game show.

Youngest Jamal (Ayush Khedekar) and youngest Salim (Azharuddin Ismail) are brothers who pull off petty mischief every now and then. Always late for the school duo or musketeers take the youngest Latika (Rubiana Ali) as their third musketeer after their mother gets killed in the riots. Orphanage doesn’t go well and they all run away in the middle of the night only to be chased by the owner Maman (Ankur Vikal) and Co. Salim and Jamal manage to get on to the moving train while Latika is running along with the train whilst holding Salim’s hand. Despite the desperate cries of Jamal to pull Latika in, Salim intentionally leaves her hand.

The fate takes the brothers to Agra and back to Mumbai (it was Bombay when they had left). It had been seven or eight years since the last time Jamal had last seen Latika. They finally trace her. She is being taught classical dance to be later sold of course when Jamal sees her through a key-hole. Salim exclaims she is hot and opens the door. All three are united but life changes for all of them thereafter. Salim ditches his own brother at gun-point after throwing him out of house only to be left alone with Latika. Latika too agrees to sleep with the brother for the sake of Jamal’s life.

Few years down the line Jamal working as a chaiwalla in a call center chances upon Salim’s contact number and meets him. In one of the most poignant scene I have seen in recent times, the meeting of the two brothers is well executed (technically, watch the scene where Jamal imagines he jumped off the building with Salim) and well acted upon; Jamal’s continuous outburst of “There was no message” shows 18-year old Dev Patel is a name to reckon in years to come. He is simply brilliant in that scene and the one after when he looks wrathfully in Salim’s eyes and says, “I will never forgive you.”

Jamal inquires about Latika. Salim chooses to ignore the question. Only when he follows Salim one day that he realizes that Latika is now a mistress (or wife probably) of gangster Javed (Mahesh Manjrekar) for whom Salim in fact works. He enters the well guarded house on the pretext of being a dishwasher. He requests Latika to run off with him which she refuses while putting forth question “what for?” “Love” Jamal says. It never happens as Javed is home then and Jamal loses Latika for third time now. The next is climax which I would not reveal.

Indians and Awards:

I’m not going to judge or argue whether Slumdog deserved all the accolades or not. I mean, look who’s talking? When Feroz Khan wins an award for best villain for Janasheen; where Shahrukh wins every possible award for KKHH, Devdas and gets nominated in the best actor category, no less, for KANK; where John Abraham wins an award for Dhoom and gets nominated for Babul; where Paheli and Eklavya are sent to the Oscars as India’s official entry, and a movie like My Brother… Nikhil gets only a single nomination, I mean, seriously, Is this a joke? Are you trying to tell me, we are the best judges of good cinema?

First of all, I wonder, why are we stuck up with these Oscars and Golden Globes? These awards pertain to a different industry and have a jury which has perspectives completely different from Bollywood. If you start comparing their winners with our winners head to head, it wouldn’t make sense. How can you compare apples and oranges?

Secondly, every jury is made up of human beings who are prone to have their biases, favorites and could be open to lobbying. I repeat every jury and not only the foreign juries. It happens all the time in India. I’m not saying that’s what has got Slumdog its awards. But what I’m saying is, don’t read too much into these awards. They have a mind of their own (jury).

I’d even argue that I liked RDB and TZP better than any other movie I’ve ever seen (and I’ve seen quite a few) . But then, I’m not the only person who decides, and I may have my biases working here.

Richard Attenborough's Gandhi won several accolades abroad while Shyam Benegal’s The making of the Mahatma did not. Maybe, they have their biases or maybe a foreign director understands his audiences and their sensibilities better and caters to it.

Again, I wouldn’t give an opinion on whether it is the best to deserve such nominations; But I’d say this - Slumdog is definitely worth a hell lot of attention. The stark depiction of the dirty side of India is upsetting and I’m surprised that instead of seeing this movie as one that brings our wounds out in the open, begging for attention, we’re going into denial and trying to push this back under the carpet. If some awards get it the attention it deserves, then so be it.

Feel good? Sure :-)

I mean, I didn’t want the movie to end. Jamal in all his three avatars is as endearing as any kid can get. You tend to reach out to him. And then he shocks you beyond repair "If it wasn’t for Ram and Allah, I’d still have my mother". Is this something that you deny or cure?

15 Park Avenue - What is reality?

2009-01-25T23:19:00.000-08:00

I had written this a long time back when I caught this brilliant work and posted somewhere on the net too and in my old blog which went dormant and locked later. So I had to post this again. Such masterwork the film! It was one of the most touching films I have seen. The dialogue delivery was a bit dragging at places still that didn’t take the essence of the film away. The ending is kind of open to interpretations and I love when a movie ends that way. You feel like catching the story teller and question them

My take on the film:

I thought that most part of the film was Anju’s (Shabana Azmi) imagination. She is the schizophrenic. There are many references of her being overbearing and tough. This is mentioned many times by different people. May be some of the characters were not even real and existed only in her imagination like Rahul Bose’s Jojo. Konkana Sen was probably her imagination too or her sister who moved away to New York and lived in 15 Park Avenue with her happy family. Why would the doctor be always with Shabana? He was most certainly her Psychiatrist.

Shabana was married once but they never say why she got divorced? She is shown as teaching Quantum Mechanics as a Physics Professor. Quantum mechanics arise from the mathematics of parallel universes. So was Shabana living in a parallel universe of her own? Towards the end we see the doctor entering the house which Konkana Sen had supposedly entered, the white house with black rods gate marked as No. 15. The doctor then comes out with the old lady which clearly indicated that Konkana Sen never went inside or even existed. That house belonged to someone else.

Then we hear Shabana frantically asking for 15 Park Avenue. The tremble in her voice was disturbing. We see Doctor taking her away from the crowd. A real masterpiece by Aparna Sen!

I believe the main point about the film is a schizophrenic creates her own world and characters. They are real to her. Who is to say that her world is unreal and ours is real? So I believe Aparna Sen left that for us to interpret. With that ending she just made the real world a paradox.

Aparna Sen’s take on 15 Park Avenue: “15 Park Avenue’ is about the human situation that arises from the medical crisis. One of the basic themes in the film is the question of reality… the sick girl’s reality and that of others around her. Who’s to say which is more real? This is a question that has been bothering me for a long time. We’re all searching for the core reality that we can’t find.”

. . . And the stupid shall inherit the earth

2009-01-06T22:39:00.000-08:00

Somethings make you wonder, why are we so stupid in our country most of the time? Why can't we be the funny and smart date for once?

Is it the food? Is it because a lot of people are vegetarian? Or it's the sex deprivation? Or like that alien video in a old movie, the stupidity travels from one person to another in the form of India TV?

What is it, exactly?

I read an article yesterday that Mr. Mumbai himself, Sir Raj Thackrey, has issued a "fatwa" banning Pakistani books from bookstores in Bombay. And the books have been removed. Well, because mostly bookshop owners do not want to see all their nice, shiny new books torn and thrown on the ground. So they promise to bring the two books by Pakistani authors back sometime in the future.

Mind you, there is no official ban. That's because the Maharashtra government is busy trying to, well, errr, ummm, write scripts for Ram Gopal Varma movies? Just like the UP government is busy building lots of statues and the Tamil Nadu government is busy trying to launch TV channels and the Bengal government is busy trying to fight an opposition who wants to teach old commies a thing or two about being a commie. The Delhi government is busy trying to figure out how it won the election and no one has told Vasundhra Raje that she ain't the Rajasthan Chief Minister anymore. Oh, and the Gujrat government is trying to get the last available spot on Roadies.

Do we really want to turn into that 70's country? Aren't we supposed to be the mature one? At least internationally. We all know the real truth (nudge nudge, wink wink). Aren't we the agony aunt all our neighbors come crying to when they are bullied in some international body or another? Although nobody really listens to us because they treat us like a step-grandmother, who although means well, is somehow always misunderstood.

Let's face it. We share our borders with mostly schizophrenic and dellusional countries. China may have the greatest economy in the world now, but write one blog post criticizing the government and they have you tortured, jailed and booked for life before you can even say Kung Pao Chicken. Nepal has more political parties than actual seats in it's parliament. Bangladesh keeps producing more and more underage Kolkatta sex workers and Sri Lanka just wants to get the overseas rights of all Rajni movies. Then there is Pakistan. Whose current state reminds me of the tagline of an old show Drew Carrey used to produce. Whose line is it anyway? - The show where everything is made up and the points don't matter.

Don't we get it? We are the only country keeping this place sane. Well, sort off. We are like the only member of a boyband who can actually sing. Or the playboy bunny who doesn't sleep with Hugh Hefner or like the Micheal Corleone character from The Godfather right before he kills Captain McCluskey and Virgil Sollozo.

I know mob lynching everything we don't like sounds super-duper fun, but let's leave the sixth century censorship to others.

Point is that if we turn psycotic and stupid too, where will really poor and cheap tourists from North America and Europe go for vacations and spritual blow jobs?

Thailand?

(p.s. In case you're wondering, I don't get paid to promote tourism in Thailand. Or anywhere else for that matter. I don't get paid at all.)

And So, The Year Finally Ends!

2008-12-30T21:33:00.000-08:00

It took 365 days for this year to end. Usually, I wouldn’t have noticed how quickly the time flies and would have said some inane comment like, “I didn’t know how quickly the time flew this year!” but this time it’s different. It took an eternity for the year to end.

It was a crappy year, with good memories few and far between. Resisting the temptation to lash out at certain people, slander a lot more and regret a lot of choices I’ve taken and decisions that I’ve made, I’ll try to re-live those moments that were worth remembering.

I really hope all of you have had a much better year than I have. I wish you all a fantastic new year ahead! Don’t bother making resolutions - they’re too optimistic to live up to! :)

Most famous men of the world..

2008-12-25T22:52:00.000-08:00

These are/were worlds famous men . All in a single photograph .. Got it while browsing .

How many can you identify ??

click on the image to enlarge it.

As He Slides Down The Chimney…

2008-12-24T21:47:00.000-08:00

… we all prepare ourselves for a fabulous Christmas and a wonderful holiday season. Offices are shut, schools are out, colleges don’t bother to announce holidays as no one turns up anyway, people are relaxed, credit cards are swiped, gifts are bought, new friendships are born, old ones are revived, songs are sung, movies are seen, smiles are wider, roads are emptier, hugs are warmer, kisses are sweeter, vacations are planned and blogs are forgotten…
I wish you all a fantastic year ahead. Have a Merry Merry Christmas and I hope all your wishes, dreams, hopes and fantasies come true! It’s the time for miracles, after all!
I’m in two minds - to take a vacation or to sit at home, all cozy and warm and snug. I guess my lunacy will rule and I’ll take a much-needed vacation!

Cheers! I’ll see you when I see you!

The Life and the Love of Balconies

2008-12-16T00:16:00.000-08:00

A lazy noon or be it the early morning hues of the sun or the orange dusk of the sky or a star-lit night in either a lonely space with clothes hung to dry or a fun filled moment with the family, Balconies are the most integral part of one's life. So is the terrace. It is the heart of the home, rather an home in itself. It gives out the best feeling of being at home. The magic of moonlight slyly sneaking onto you, when you're either a busy battering brain, sitting with a pen and a mind totally in action, or a laziness doused on the cold floor with a book at an unearthly hour. Lost in your train of thought-less thoughts. The magic is multiplied with the myriad magnificence of moods.

I remember falling in love with this place in my childhood days, Balcony-The heart of the home. Balconies hold a prominent place in the growing up years, for that matter even in the days of grown-ups too. The sight of a child in the lap of a grand-parent in the rocking chair either listening to a story or a shout to the parent inside for a minute's sight outside. Somebody walking to and fro in the balcony with a text-book in hand, somebody relaxing with music plugged in. The sight of a dreamy deary one passing by the road when the lady-love is busy in a idle-chat with mom in the balcony.

Growing up with balconies provides the solace in love and comfort with the re-assurance of the knowledge that there is someone-always-there-for-you. The shutting of the balcony door after a fight with dad/mom/sibling. The furious made-up-mad-mood till someone comes to pacify you. The comfort when mom brings food to the balcony and feeds you, The sight of the pet lying next to you, waiting to be petted. The sight of dad returning home after a day's work, the shout in joy when seeing a friend. The watching of rainbow with the sibling after a downpour.

When life beckons you in Joy or sorrow, Balcony with its wistful looks waits for you, to let you into its life. The moments cried in hurt and humiliation, the vent-up anger, those failures, the failed first love, fight with a friend, loss of a loved one, the bottled envy and frustration. The planned secret first meeting, the chance meeting of him/her in the terrace. The long hours of chronic-conversations, the laid-back night with the silver hues of the moonlit night sky.The meeting of the newly-weds for a private conversation. The look of the colored wall after the Holi celebrations.

The long conversation with an old friend while catching up after a long-time. The talk that easily shifts from the new job to the recently read-book to the mega-flop Drona to the still-missed The Dark Knight and The Kung-fu Panda or listening to the magic of music when someone plays a music instrument.

Life is when you live. The life ahead with a promising newness to everything. The million dreams and a zillion hope that one life has in store to offer. The painful yet an exciting truth that life is all about moving on. The enlightened knowledge that these beautiful moments of life gives is an immense joy. The understanding that at times life is more like the sight from a balcony. The detachment only comes from the true attachment. All those insightful-inevitable moments of life is witnessed only by the sole-soul of the home-Balconies.

5 Winks....

2008-11-28T05:24:00.000-08:00

It’s about five cadres of people who irritate me or the five cadres – ‘I love to hate’. Here it goes….

1. School Children Who Never Grew Up – A Wink

These are arcane people who go on orchestrating – “I haven’t studied anything, I think I’ll flunk in exams” and end up being the toppers of the class leaving behind people like me, cheated & ruined of hopes. “Oh you got 80%?? I scored very less, 90%” another of their trademark dialogues. I terribly feel enticed to force their faces into a small tank of water and whack them on their backs until the truth is accepted. Over the years, I’ve developed a strategy of “Screw them at sight” and ended up successful.

2. “I Have the Best, Not You…” – A Wink

I know a few guys who belong to this ‘hate instigating’ cadre. These are morons who say – “Sony is better when I buy Samsung and say Samsung is better when I buy Sony.” Sadist and insatiable minded dissidents they are. Hope these ‘back seat drivers’ grow up and start appreciating others for what they are worthy of.

3. Children like Competitors who never grew Up – A Wink

Okay, lets start with an example- I say – “Hey listen, Brad Pitt is going to play a super hero in his next movie.” And the reply comes- “Yeaaahhh of course, I know… (In one of the world’s top ten irritating tones)”, when they wouldn’t have even had a clue about it. More girls fall into this category. I fight a losing battle not to piss them off in all possible ways but only in vain.

4. Disgusting habits Which Never Changed – A Wink

This category of people is ‘New Entries’ but strong contenders for a spot in the top3. I recently had been to my friend’s place when they offered me coffee to be had alongside their family members. This fellow (my friend) started sipping that coffee with a weird, disgusting sound which was then followed by their whole family emanating a kind of DTS effect. It was one of those rare instances when I, out of ultimate disgust left the house in a hurry as if there was a national emergency or something. The same night, I had a dream of taking them all to ‘Coffee Day’. Unbelievable me..!!

5. “I wont Read Yours But You Read Mine” – Another Wink

Then crawling up to no.5 are spammers who spam on the ‘comments page’ of my blog. “Nice post and a nice blog. Do visit mine on www.spamrascals.com”. I would rather prefer them not commenting. “My dear Lord, please save them from my curses...!”

(These were the 5 cadres of people. But, by fact every person would have negatives. It also depends on one’s perspective. Maybe even I’m the sacred cow in another blog. So, I wouldn’t say I hate these cadres of people but would just like to say I observe them, pity them, wink & carry on.)

Shades of Grey

2008-11-19T06:55:00.000-08:00

When we were children, we all believed in the stark difference between good people and bad people. In the stories we heard and read, there existed brave but kind princes who were also handsome and they found beautiful princesses who were invariably pious and true; and this is to say nothing of all the other virtues they possessed too. Then there were the wicked, ugly witches and stepmothers; mean, loud ogres; and of course the big bad wolf.

Almost all of us grew up with stories about these and other similar characters and the distinction between absolute goodness and total badness was deeply etched in our young minds. Of course one must admit first of all that such myths play a vital role in inculcating good values in children the world over and therefore contribute to the continuation of a decent society. But the other side of the coin is that we learn to unrealistically categorize people into two groups, one the epitome of all good and the other the embodiment of evil.

When we slowly come into full contact with society, we somehow realize that this is not exactly the case; many people who sometimes completely conform to our acquired values tend to baffle us at other times when they act in despicable ways. Gradually it dawns on us that nobody is entirely black or white and everyone has a shade of grey- a mix of both good and bad. The hard part is making this adjustment in our worldview the right way.

Some of us, myself included, still find it painful when our trusted and good friends or relatives sometimes uncharacteristically veer off-course and shatter our expectations of them. We just fail to figure out why they acted the way they did, and not how we would have thought they would according to our past experience. We often forget that people have many- sometimes conflicting- motives that they themselves are not always fully in control of, and so it is natural, if not desirable, for them to display dissimilarities in their behaviour at different times.

On the other hand, one may become so frustrated with the changing ways of others that one simply gives up trying to come to grips with them, settling instead for a rather cynical approach to the world. Though this may insulate one from a lot of heartache in one’s relations with society, it is a pity to see such individuals who have a lonely, joyless existence due to their aloofness.

Hard as it is, we must try to better understand the powerful conflicting undercurrents that various experiences ours exert on us all, leading us astray at times. Having a clearer idea of these influences in our lives would make it easier for us to come to terms with not only other people’s apparent misdemeanours but our own occasional missteps too.

The Secret

2008-11-10T10:00:00.000-08:00

Ask - Believe - Receive

Yes this is secret to happiness, wealth, love and all you wanted in your life according to this book by Rhonda Byrne. Yeah, this is a three step process to get all those things you ever dreamt and desired. Rhonda Byrne and many happy, healthy and wealthy folks (in her book) like her have reiterated zillion times that this is the only secret to life. Law of Attraction forms the basis for her book and all the people she named in the book claim that it works in your favor if you use the way she said and these people did.

In Alchemist Paulo Coelho said the same thing with amazing play of words and poetry. I loved it to the core. But primary difference between a Brazilian and his Australian counter part is putting in effort, the hard work, the endeavor and the exertion. Paulo says follow your dreams. Do what it takes to achieve what you want, and you have always dreamt. The whole universe will work towards achieving that for you.

“When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”

Like in Om Shanti Om Shahrukh Khan mugged it to Hindi version, “Kehte hain agar kisi cheez ko agar dil se chaho to saari kayanath tumhe usse milane ki koshish me lag jaati hai”

But according Rhonda and her friends; there is noting you do to get what you want. Just Ask. Keep Faith (Believe). And receive. Just live your life as you have always done. Change your thoughts, your style, your behavior and you are done. Leave rest to the universe. Like if you want marry and living in the house with two car garage, always park your car to one side and leave space for your to be spouse.

If you want money, give money, believe in charity. Feel and be grateful that you have plenty of it and money will come to you.

The irksome thing I found with book is your uselessness. It kind of gives you feeling that you are there only to consume, to get, and guzzle. There is no larger purpose to your life in this universe.

She agrees that it is being and acting like selfish to the core. Her justification says universe will react to your thoughts, your desires and dreams. You can not desire for others, you can not dream for others. Only thing you can do to make other people rich is dream for more money and share. Ask for money in abundance and create wealth for the world.

The Alchemist not only achieved what he always kept dreaming but in his path to his fortune he helped other people achieve their dreams. He acted as mean or aided others to in their path to their glory and success.

I personally think life and universe want you to get what you desire and what you dream. It works towards your goals and your needs if you believe in it and be gracious to it. In nutshell be buoyant and be optimistic.

Be grateful to life and keep working towards it. Your life is your dream, your life is your endeavor to get what you dream of and this is universe is your play ground. It is meant for you to play the game of life.

Just asking, believing and receiving is not life, at least not for me. It is the endeavor and adventure that counts for me.

Mark your presence, say something; just don’t read :)

The Value of Money

2008-11-09T08:54:00.000-08:00

This is something I recently read on Amitabh Bachchan's blog and felt that the topic is immensely relevant in today’s times. Especially for the youth.

A Blog Post by Singapore’s Youngest Millionaire
By Adam Khoo
On Money

Some of you may already know that I travel around the region pretty frequently, having to visit and conduct seminars at my offices in Malaysia, Indonesia, Thailand and Suzhou (China). I am in the airport almost every other week so I get to bump into many people who have attended my seminars or have read my books.

Recently, someone came up to me on a plane to KL and looked rather shocked. He asked, ‘How come a millionaire like you is travelling economy?’ My reply was, ‘That’s why I am a millionaire. ‘ He still looked pretty confused. This again confirms that greatest lie ever told about wealth (which I wrote about in my latest book ‘Secrets of Self-Made Millionaires’ ). Many people have been brainwashed to think that millionaires have to wear Gucci, Hugo Boss, Rolex, and sit on first class in air travel. This is why so many people never become rich because the moment that earn more money, they think that it is only natural that they spend more, putting them back to square one.

The truth is that most self-made millionaires are frugal and only spend on what is necessary and of value. That is why they are able to accumulate and multiply their wealth so much faster. Over the last 7 years, I have saved about 80% of my income while today I save only about 60% (because I have my wife, mother in law, 2 maids, 2 kids, etc. to support). Still, it is way above most people who save 10% of their income (if they are lucky). I refuse to buy a first class ticket or to buy a $300 shirt because I think that it is a complete waste of money. However, I happily pay $1,300 to send my 2-year old daughter to Julia Gabriel Speech and Drama without thinking twice.

When I joined the YEO (Young Entrepreneur’ s Organization) a few years back (YEO is an exclusive club open to those who are under 40 and make over $1m a year in their own business) I discovered that those who were self-made thought like me. Many of them with net worths well over $5m, travelled economy class and some even drove Toyota’s and Nissans (not Audis, Mercs, BMWs).

I noticed that it was only those who never had to work hard to build their own wealth (there were also a few ministers’ and tycoons’ sons in the club) who spent like there was no tomorrow. Somehow, when you did not have to build everything from scratch, you do not really value money. This is precisely the reason why a family’s wealth (no matter how much) rarely lasts past the third generation. Thank God my rich dad (oh no! I sound like Kiyosaki) foresaw this terrible possibility and refused to give me a cent to start my business.

Then some people ask me, ‘What is the point in making so much money if you don’t enjoy it?’ The thing is that I don’t really find happiness in buying branded clothes, jewellery or sitting first class. Even if buying something makes me happy it is only for a while, it does not last. Material happiness never lasts, it just give you a quick fix. After a while you feel lousy again and have to buy the next thing which you think will make you happy. I always think that if you need material things to make you happy, then you live a pretty sad and unfulfilled life.

Instead, what make ME happy is when I see my children laughing and playing and learning so fast. What makes me happy is when I see my companies and trainers reaching more and more people every year in so many more countries. What makes me really happy is when I read all the emails about how my books and seminars have touched and inspired someone’s life. What makes me really happy is reading all your wonderful posts about how this BLOG is inspiring you. This happiness makes me feel really good for a long time, much much more than what a Rolex would do for me.

I think the point I want to put across is that happiness must come from doing your life’s work (be in teaching, building homes, designing, trading, winning tournaments etc.) and the money that comes is only a by-product. If you hate what you are doing and rely on the money you earn to make you happy by buying stuff, then I think that you are living a life of meaninglessness.

Guest post :)

2008-10-30T09:29:00.000-07:00

This is going to be a guest post from a cousin of mine, Jyoti Mundra who reads my blog often and she unlike most has the ability to pen down her beautiful thoughts. This is going to be her first post and if she likes the response enough maybe then she will send in some more. So here it goes:

Cycle of Life

Joy and sorrow;

Dark and light;

Hope and despair;

Euphoria and plight;

The cycle of life

Is here to stay,

After night, comes morning,

Come what may.

Happily greeting one,

With next, putting up a fight

Just two sides of a coin,

You need to get this right.

Why resist the storm?

Why cry foul?

So easy to fall in the trap,

So tough to teach your soul.

Who’s to blame?

Not the universe nor is it you,

Look over the horizon; evolve and grow,

You are the key, and that’s the clue.

Go out, Brave the storm,

The winds and the pouring rain,

Enjoy the moment, take pleasure my friend,

Rainbow will appear, if you don’t refrain.

Have faith in yourself,

Have faith in the force,

He knows you can handle it

Life is but, a lifetime course!

Jyoti Mundra

19th October, 2008

2008-10-19T03:29:00.000-07:00

19^th October, 2008

11.23 P.M.

In less than an hour. I’ll be a year older. Nothing very significant or life changing. The house is asleep. I decide to count-down the time till midnight, looking at the moon, through the iron-grilled roof in the balcony. It is a contrasting sight. The moon, tainted a bit here, blemished a little there, but beautiful nevertheless, against the cold back iron rods of the grill. I put my hands up to touch the moon. The grill comes in the way.

I close my eyes and contemplate. The past year is perhaps the one in which I’ve forced to lean more pages from the unending book called Life, than ever before. Joys and sorrows, ups and downs, ecstasy and heart break, the past year has been more eventful than any other. I’ve learnt a lot of things, most importantly about myself. That I’m not as mature as I choose to think I am. That I’m no good at judging people. That some of the people I trusted the most, could betray me without emotion, without guilt is proof enough of how misplaced my trust had been. That what other are, changes nothing but what you choose to be changes everything. That money comes last in the list of things that happiness to people- love comes first. That if you stop to listen to what people say about you, you will stop listening to yourself. That time heals and cures. That anger is ugly but vengeance is the ugliest. That you should live by rules and the rules should be made by you and your standards shouldn’t be diluted for anyone however rude you appear to them. That it is not distance which separates people. You can be hundreds of miles apart from loved one but still share the same thought or sit inches apart physically yet be light years separate in minds. That loneliness and being alone are two different entities. You can be surrounded by a hundred people and still feel lonely or be alone and feel at peace. The individual I’m today has been a transition which was rough, tough and unsteady, but I have survived. I know there is a lot more yet to be faced here in this world. I’ve learnt not to give up on people easily, to be patient, to give them time.

But there are some things, infact a lot more things that I’m yet to learn and understand. The harder lessons, the ones that need endurance and perseverance are yet to come. The path ahead looks misty and uncertain. I don’t know what awaits me after a couple of steps forward. Whether I walk on unfaltering or stumble down and fall; only time will tell. But the present moment is prefect. I, the moon, a melody and an iron grill in between no hurry. The grill will be there and the moon will be there too. And I ill reach it, through the grill, another day.Until then I should wait.

I thank everyone who have wished me luck for the year ahead. And I need to tell my readers something that I though of writing this post after reading Suvro sir’s birthday post. I very well know that this post is no where near to the wonderful post he has put up on his blog, but this is what I felt on the eve of my birthday and thought this could possibly be the next post on my blog too.

Osama

2008-10-13T02:37:00.000-07:00

‘We want work’, ‘We are widows’, and ‘We are not political’. Few burqa clad women chant this and display it on placard while taking out a rebellion on the Taliban ruled streets of Afghanistan one day. A young boy Espandi (Arif Herati) is shown smoldering away the curses and asking for a dollar from the firangi journalist who is filming this procession. A woman, name not known (Khwaja Nader) accompanied by her daughter, name not known (Marina Golbahari) are on their way to hospital where the mother works as nurse. Suddenly Taliban strikes and procession goes violent. Woman, her daughter and Espandi take protection in a house. The girl unhurriedly peeps through the door ajar. Her misty eyes see the brutalities of Taliban and tears roll down her cheek.

Soon the mother-daughter duo get to know that they are rendered penniless as the Taliban has closed down the hospital. At home in night whilst cooking the meal mother breaks down and longs for a man in family who could support them as her husband and brother had died in Russian war. She then blights looking at her daughter, ’wish I had boy’. The third female in the family, the grandmother is arranging the young girl’s hair into neat braid and narrates a bed time story to her as how passing under ‘Rainbow’ can make boy a girl and girl a boy. Granny suggests the mother to cut the girl’s hair, make her don her father’s clothes so that she can be passed as a boy and can earn a living outside. The girl objects but this is the last resort left to the destitute family.

Upon being disposed to work in a tea shop, the ordeal starts for the girl. She is continually terrified at the thought that her secret will be out any moment and walks to work and back home in constant fear. The words spoken are less but those scenes are well shot as the fear shown on the face of girl is to feel sorry for. She emotes marvelously through her eyes. Espandi, the boy who had seen her before recognizes her in an instant but settles to keep it a secret in exchange of few dimes.

The tribulation for her is never ending, what with few doubting eyes following her once till her home and furthermore when the owner of tea shop takes her to a mosque full of men to pray. But the vital one is when she along with all the boys is taken confined by Taliban to religious school so that young boys can be trained for the war. There amidst all boys she tries hard to behave like a boy but in vain and is soon being called a nymph by all including the Mullah who teaches them the ablutions to be performed by male to conquer the wet dreams apart from Koran. Her feminine looks and behavior could not be hidden and all boys start teasing her. Espandi comes to her rescue when few ask her to drop her Pyajama so that they can be sure she indeed is a boy. Espandi chases the other boys away and when few ask for her name christens her ‘Osama’.

Espandi comes to her rescue other times too but even he could not do much when her true identity is revealed in one of the most disturbing scenes I have ever seen. Espandi sees her and cries helplessly whilst she is chased by all in the confined walls of school. She is taken captive and is sent for a trial.

Without disclosing what happens next, the film definitely doesn’t end on a happy note. It is a dark cinema where each frame of it can melt any heart. The protagonist Osama (Marina) and all other characters are real and picked from the streets of Kabul. Marina herself was a beggar when director spotted her and took her in his film (Source Wikipedia).

When I chanced upon this movie by sheer luck (no one had recommended me; my DVDs rental-wala told me to take it as many were hiring this from him), I had no idea that this movie was hugely acclaimed and had won many awards. I also had no clue that the actors were picked from real life. After watching the movie and doing some random search on web I saw it again and felt the same heaviness in the heart which I had experienced before. We all know how a particular scene or a sequence can bring a lump in the throat but what would you call a movie where you have bulge and the lump throughout. I would call it a masterpiece.

Director Siddiq Barmark can be without doubt termed a genius as it takes humongous guts and effort to make immature or call it amateur actors enact the psyche of people from a war-trodden places. The editing is top class and could not get better. The poor and tattered neighborhood is captured in a basic way and as the film is shot in real locations gives it an intact look. Screenplay at times looks cut to short as per expectation but you soon realize it is intentional.

The film not for once looks off track or displays any irrational angle to it in its 80-odd minutes of running. Few scenes that need special mention here are:

When the girl after her hair being chopped off plants one of the braids in the mud-pot and waters it in the night in hope it never ceases to grow.

Women are singing and dancing as there is a marriage in the neighborhood but soon Taliban barges in upon hearing the clatter. Women speedily assemble and start crying pretending there is mourning and not a celebration. What a pity.

The first time when the girl steps out of her house as boy and walks the street, she is scared stiff and alarmed at every step. You can experience her misfortune.

Famous musician, philosopher and physician Albert Schweitzer said this, “Reverence for Life affords me my fundamental principle of morality, namely, that good consists in maintaining, assisting, and enhancing life and that to destroy, harm, or to hinder life is evil.”

However people of Afghanistan and of other war-torn countries do not have any such fundamental principle or in my opinion are not even aware that ‘to-live’ is their fundamental right. These countries in Middle East face varied problems of either terrorism or of dominion or both but when it comes to women, they all stand alike. Women in these countries are nothing but an object of lust, fruit-bearer and not even that if they do not have a man in their lives.

How a woman supposed to earn a living if she cannot step out without a male companion related by blood and she doesn’t have any male left in family after losing them to war or terrorism?

P.S. And you probably thought this might have got to do with Osama Bin Laden. Sigh!!!

Without

2008-10-03T22:25:00.000-07:00

Love without love is a clouded glass
is a childhood dream, is an adult fear.
Love without love is a pleasurable state
without the problems and pain of love.
Life without life is depressing and cold
violent and sad, brought on by loneliness.
Life without life is a troublesome trap
never escaping, just going in circles.
Hate without hate is an envious state
is a lover’s thorn, is a broken date
is an evil state. Hate without hate
is a motive to kill when love is at stake.
Death without death is an obsession with grief
is a sad response to a lost dear one.
Death without death is pain enough.
Let go of the grief, you’ve suffered enough.
———————————————-
The original poem had one more stanza which I’ll reproduce below, but now I think it makes it a little too obvious.
So the last stanza is:
Love without love is sex.
Life without life is depression.
Hate without hate is jealousy.
Death without death is mourning.

So, your thoughts? I think leaving out the last stanza is fine, but are the points obvious above without it?

Never Let Me Go..

2008-09-25T10:20:00.000-07:00

What would you do if you find out that you are brought into this world for a special purpose? A purpose of brightening somebody’s life at the expense of yourself. What if you are made to live in an artificial world with sole purpose to unzip your organs when needed? What would you feel if someone walks up to you one day to announce that, “You were brought into this world for a purpose, and your futures, all of them, have been decided”

A thought so chilling to even to think about, finds life and voice in ‘Never Let Me Go’. This novel is set in a school by name ‘Hailsham’ where cloned children are reared in an artificial establishment to be the donors of future. A world completely devoid of moral implications and incredibly insensitive to the sensitivity of human emotions. A world of three kids: Kathy, Ruth and Tommy, filled with what seems like a benign bliss of childhood unravels into a great sham of artificiality, where simple words like ‘donations’, ‘complete’ assume grotesque ramifications. Kathy’s observation about Madame’s revulsion: “Madame was afraid of us. But she was afraid of us in the same way someone might be afraid of spiders. We hadn’t been ready for that. It had never occurred to us to wonder how we would feel, being seen like that, being the spiders.” Or the silent acceptance of donations reflected thus: “All the same, some of it must go in somewhere. It must go in, because by the time a moment like that comes along, there’s a part of you that’s been waiting. Maybe from as early as when you’re five or six, there’s been a whisper going at the back of your head, saying: “One day, maybe not so long from now, you’ll get to know how it feels.” So you’re waiting, even if you don’t quite know it, waiting for the moment when you realize that you really are different to them; that there are people out there, like Madame, who don’t hate you or wish you any harm, but who nevertheless shudder at the very thought of you–of how you were brought into this world and why–and who dread the idea of your hand brushing against theirs. The first time you glimpse yourself through the eyes of a person like that, it’s a cold moment. It’s like walking past a mirror you’ve walked past every day of your life, and suddenly it shows you something else, something troubling and strange.” Subtly dark and infinitely sad, this book casts a fatalistic note on human lives that are led in a cloak of artificiality. Probably, that’s why my heart didn’t ache for the characters, though it bled for the sheer helplessness of the situation.

A deep seated loatihng for a place from which there is no escape, rather than to await the dead end that is reserved by the time one is born. This book sets itself not to explore the technicalities of cloning or the perils of being a clone, but rather captures the fine nuances of humanity in minute detail and makes one wonder about the core definition of it. The context of the book feels artificial, the tone has a note of fatality, yet the people feel awfully natural. Albeit, cast in a cloud of cold desolateness. This book is not for those who are on look out for heroes. For all the characters are patient victims in waiting for their end, leading a life as if its on loan, with an air of detachment around them which they flaunt mercilessly, accepting in silence the grim fatality of the life that they are leading.

How glad I was that this story is still a piece of fiction and not a disgusting manifestation of the modern day genetic experiments that intend to deliver greater good to greater lot at the cost of assured unhappiness for some.

Dreams….

2008-08-29T00:21:00.000-07:00

Haunted by my dreams, this post is a result of midnight musings, after I soothed my frayed nerves by a short chat with my sister. These days I realized that dreams are my deepest desires which I have never acknowledged. It’s like those persistent voices which never got a chance, and hence they manifest in the eerie visions of the dreamland when our resistance to logically refute is at all time low. Most of the things I dream are either about things that I heard of, or things that I want to happen or stories that I read somewhere. Those some of these often take me by surprise, they would Laos make me believe that I am what I dream. But dreaming alone won’t achieve what I long for, right? May be I don’t live my dreams because I live my fears. May be, I magnify my fears with the thinking mind and lull the heart’s desire with cold reason.Dreams are reservoir of feelings, thoughts, urges, memories and most of the contents of the dreams are either unacceptable or unpleasant.
My experience of dreams goes a long way back. Most of my dreams weave those ‘what if’ sequences about the opportunities that life presents. Some of them could be about me visualizing how it would look if I try bungee jumping or about how would life be in a different country, or about how is an ordinary day in a new environment. Yet, these are what make me come to terms with my anxieties and facts of life while making me comfortable with the fear from the unknown.
And there are those creative dreams either about the stories I heard, movies I partly saw or books that I read somewhere. One of those vivid childhood dreams that stayed with me is this dream of Ramayana, which started from where the Hanuman brings the sanjeevani to the end of war. I distinctly remember this, for I stayed long in bed so that this dream finds its end. Well, there are dreams where I played wild roles, like a daredevil detective, or a super woman, but let me assure you, these are quite rare. It’s been long time since I played the batwoman. Yet, the kick of these dreams lies in the way I could manipulate those sequences, or even create them to my satisfaction.
And then there are those dreams that helped me overcome my fears. In childhood, I have always been afraid of things like loosing family members or snakes. I am not sure if I overcome any of those fears. But I remember those dreams which made me run till I made a choice to pick a stick and fight or those that portrayed loss of loved ones and taught me to appreciate their value in life.
But of all these dreams that I had, I never felt as if I am an inactive participant. I have always,(ok, I concede) most of the times, been able to direct my dream to my desired end or end it before it turns wild. May be that’s why I never had such a predominant nightmare which became a permanent memory.A theory uses a computer metaphor to account for dreams. According to this theory, dreams serve to ‘clean up’ clutter from the mind, much like clean-up operations in a computer, refreshing the mind to prepare for the next day.
Somehow I believe that dreamland is the space where we touch the threshold of our potential and visualize the realization of our deepest desires. Some stop there, reveling in the beauty of their dreams and basking in vicarious satisfaction; while some hold on and make it a reality in this material world.
I don’t think I have a theory about what I dream, but somehow writing about them did lighten my thought at this late hour. If you are reading this, tell me about your dreams. Would love to hear about the extent and expanse of your imagined universe. Even if you don’t want to talk about it in public space, it’s ok. At least acknowledge them to yourself in solitude, else you would end up being haunted by dreams, just the way I was.

Kudos to Paul Laurence Dunbar, for he say

“What dreams we have and how they fly
Like rosy clouds across the sky;
Of wealth, of fame, of sure success,
Of love that comes to cheer and bless;
And how they whither, how they fade,
The waning wealth, the jilting jade —
The fame that for a moment gleams,
Then flies forever, — dreams, ah — dreams!”
Life for some is living a dream, and for some, its outliving them! There is always a time, a space when I am my idealistic best and strive for what I dream.
Yet, alas. I wake up to greet every rising sun with a realistic gleam expecting a predictable rhythm. Masquerading as a practical, rational entity! I only have to look in myself to find those frozen dreams inside. Hanging suspended in the isolated vacuum of my demented mind. Yet, I hold fast to the dreams, for life is a barren desert if not for them! One changes with time and dreams change too. As I grow with life’s experiences, my definitions change. Reflecting upon, I realize a new tone of tolerance in life, and a fresh perspective to things. And I retire to every dusk for a new set of dreams.

Change…

2008-08-29T00:17:00.000-07:00

Mom says: When we change, we grow.

Sister says: Face your worst fears one on one. Don’t run away from it. The key to change is to let go of fear.

Friend says: If certain things change, they change for the good.

The school board says: Big things happen when you do little things right.

Mr. Monk says: Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.

Doubts…

2008-08-29T00:10:00.001-07:00

1. When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

2. If the 'black box' flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff?

3. Who copyrighted the copyright symbol?

4. Can you cry under water?

5. Why do people say, 'You've been working like a dog' when dogs just sit around all day?

6. Why are the numbers on a calculator and a phone reversed?

7. Do fish ever get thirsty?

8. Can you get cornered in a round room?

9. Why do birds not fall out of trees when they sleep?

10. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables then what is baby oil made from?

11. What should one call a male ladybird?

12. If a person suffered from amnesia and then was cured would they remember that they forgot?

13. Can you blow a balloon up under water?

14. Why is it called a 'building' when it is already built?

15. If you were traveling at the speed of sound and you turned on your radio would you be able to hear it?

16. If you're traveling at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?

17. Why is it called a TV set when there’s only one?

18. Why do most cars have speedometers that go up to at least 130 when you legally can't go that fast on any road?

19. Why are ‘apart’ments stuck together?

20. Who teaches spiders which leg to put forward first, when they start walking?

21.Why is inspiration momentary, while depression is more permanent?

Streamlining Life!

2008-08-15T03:07:00.000-07:00

That’s the phrase that’s apt so far for my stay in Durgapur. Even as I am typing the title, it sounded awkward. Yet, this title is resonating in my mind since morning and I have to let it out! :-) Is that what’s happening with me? There are a lot of changes that happened in my life in the recent times. So much has changed, yet as always, so little out of it has actually mattered.

I have had hectic travel, a tiring week, suffered a lot with pangs of relocation and loneliness, cursed fate, bid goodbyes to some close friends, fought with loved ones, experienced breach of trust in a big way and I couldn’t shield myself from wasting emotions for some people who weren’t worth a dime.

On the positive note, I thought a lot on the utility of spine, marriage, trust, values, and all sorts of cosmic questions :-), did a lot of mental training and my part of lending an ear for a couple of friends,shed laziness and became a regular to my tennis practice, enjoyed a couple of angel dreams and poems, rediscovered the solitary solitude of long walks.

They say that life is the toughest teacher for it takes the test first and offers lessons later. Reflecting back, the biggest lesson in this past two weeks is that no one ever does anything uncharacteristic of what they are. Either they inherit those values or they don’t. It is sheer foolishness to offer trust and do an emotional commitment on spineless souls hoping they would change some day.

Why Write?

2008-08-15T02:56:00.000-07:00

Last night, a girlfriend asked me why I blog on this site, and why I bother spending so much time putting ideas together and writing about them…especially when so little people read them, and even less appreciate them. She went on to say, while it was a nice hobby, it was probably a lot of time gone to waste.

That didn’t bother me so much as it made me ponder why, I myself do this. So this blogposts is a short answer to her question. Why write?

The answer:
There are times when you can’t do the things you want to, say the things you need to, or express the anger you feel. Times when words are easier written than said and actions are easier imagined than done. There are times when there’s no one who understands or cares and just times when you don’t want to talk to anyone but yourself. For all those times, I’ve written a blog.For the times that I’ve had smoke coming out of my ears, hands trembling from fear and anxiousness to the point of nausea. For the times when I’ve been too unsure about how I felt to act, and times I’ve been completely sure of what I’ve wanted, but unsure of how to get it- that’s when I wrote.

I wrote these blogposts, smiles rolling off my lips and smoke blowing out both ears. It was my indirect way to release anger and fears. Some release anger by turning to a bottle of vodka, or making the next available appointment to see their shrink. And I, I write. And it doesn’t matter much if it’s useful or not, appreciated or not, enjoyable or not. It’s something I do, because therapy is personal. Writing is personal. And more importantly, it makes me feel as though I’m on top of the world.

"Wise and Otherwise" by Sudha Murthy - Book Review

2008-08-14T10:15:00.000-07:00

I just finished reading "Wise and Otherwise" by Sudha Murthy. And I must say I am impressed and moved by the book. This book is a collection of 51 short stories (one bonus for the revised edition), every one of them being a gem. What’s more, majority of the stories are in fact real life experiences of Sudha Murthy. I bought this book a few days back and frankly speaking, it was addicting and moving. You may finish the book in a single sitting.

The first and foremost aspect of the book which I fell in love with is its simplicity. The incidents are narrated by the author in simple words, without any attempt at glamour or extravagance. The language is simple - you don’t need a dictionary to understand it. The opinions put forth are direct. It’s almost as if the author does not want to attract attention; this is the most attractive feature of the book. The one thing that I liked about the book is that it stuck to the story without many generalizations of the situation and kept it human and personal.

No story is more than 5 or 6 pages long. However, each and every story is a lesson in life! That’s not to say that every story paints a rosy picture of life. Sudha Murthy gives some instances which clearly portray the vagaries of life. Some of these incidents are so moving, you are forced to reflect on how unfair life really is. For example there is a man who branded his aged father as "homeless" so that he would be admitted into an old-aged home.

The moral of the stories varies from humility to humanity to equality to social issues. Another feature of these stories is that they are all realistic. The masses would relate to these stories. It’s not about the "rich and famous", but about everyday people. The "heroes" in the stories are for the most part, simple and next door man. For instance, the author shares her experience of how one of her friends learnt to have a positive outlook towards life, after being inspired by a beggar dancing in the rain! Likewise, Sudha Murthy describes how a woman did not forget to express gratitude to the author even on her death-bed. The best part I liked in these stories was that they are so simple. It can happen to anyone at any point in time. It reflects the times that we are currently in and sometimes saddens one. It explained me through simple real life incidents to look at life in a way of optimism and only optimism. A great comic sense and a great attitude towards life, makes this legend Sudha Murthy an ideal." A man too clever by half” was the best in comedies. It brings out the author, Sudha Murthy as a strong personality. I can’t say if reading this book will change the way of your life or not...but take my word. It’ll definitely change your perspective! The stories bring out a spectrum of emotions while you are reading. Recommend this to the non -readers too; the stories are short.

Finally, another highlight of the book is the experience factor. The way the stories are written, you can clearly see the feelings, the emotions and the experiences that have gone into each of the anecdotes.It is obvious that the author has traveled far and wide - from the extremely poor villages in Orissa to the flashy environs abroad. The tiny tidbits that the author gathers in each of these encounters aggregate to form enormous experience. It is this personal insight and
experience that injects life into every single story.Yet, no matter the honesty, the effortless writing or the good intention of the author to awaken our conscience with her humbling, enriching experiences I felt the bane of the book is its own simplicity. How many youngsters may come forward to read this book?For most of them, this book could seem as a health drink that they will squirm twice before having a drink! This is no Dan-Brown thriller.But that's Sudha Murthy for you. Matter-of-fact, no-nonsense style of presentation.

Like any book that creates a lasting impression, Wise and otherwise will endure and will continue to get readers. Because there's something for everyone to learn from what Sudha has to share. And as you read through every page, you can't help marvel at the lady herself. She has become wealthy far beyond her dreams but still shows a middle-class conservative approach towards money and has an amazing heart to personally reach out and lend a helping hand to thousands and thousands of men, women and children who were struck black & blue by Fate. What's refreshing about her philanthropic work is that she just doesn't alleviate a person's physical, emotional or social penury by providing in cash or kind. She gives them tools to learn either in the form of her own advices or education so that they do not lead lives at others' mercy anymore. The book is a great read generally. Specially recommended for people who feel that the weight of the whole world is on their shoulders or for people who are over-confident about their achievements. A few humble stories. Each with an underlying thought provoking moral. These are all written by the personal experience of the author during her work and travel. Most of the paragraphs of the book are real life conversations between ordinary people.The style of writing is simple, straight and very easy to grasp. The contents and morals are no doubt appealing. I like the book because of language simplicity and fundamental truths of life explained by the mean of stories. Good for kids as well as for adults.

Now for the verdict - There's no two ways about it. Irrespective of one's demographic classification, this book is definitely worth a read. I conclude by rating "Wise and Otherwise" as a must-read; and hope to take a leaf out of it myself. The value of the book can't be quantified.Sudha Murthy has vividly narrated true incidents in her walk of life. It also explains the behavior of the people from all sections of the society. All the incidents narrated in her book might have come across in everybodys’ life. But we may not able to tell our children to learn
from it. All the characters touched the heart. When I read the incident that a village elder waited for Sudha Murthy to present a flower for her contribution in building a hospital after the completion of the function where she has been relegated to back seat, tears rolled down .It is touching moment. I plead the God to make this book compulsory in high school level so that all the students will atleast read the book!!

Beautiful stories, not larger than life, but very close to life.
Simply heart warming :)

And yes I need to thank Suvro Sir,because it was he who read out a few stories from this book last week to me,or else wouldn't have got the chance to read this lovely book!

Beauty of Well Worded Thoughts!

2008-08-14T09:46:00.000-07:00

Talking of those days when I am down and I have shut myself from the world, of those days when I cried in private and put a brave mask to the world, of those days when I lose myself in a book unwilling to face the day.. I have lived the life of an escapist at times! There are times when I felt so uncomfortable to acknowledge or accept that part of me, especially when I retracted into a rugged shell to play the recluse quarantined in my own comfortable solitude. I am breaking from the mould, as I have learned to be patient and accepting of myself, of my choices and actions.

Life’s choices are based on our reactions at that moment. Probably reflecting back, I can always say that I could have handled the moment in a better fashion. Past is always easy to judge, as it’s comprehended. Yet, things don’t look so black and white when one goes through the rigmarole! A friend of mine has beautifully worded my reaction as ’survival instinct’. It truly made me pause and wonder. What a pertinent phrase to rationalize my actions! The power that well worded observation had on me is beyond expression. It feels as if a new insight dawned on me and I looked through things in a different light! Such is the power of the right words! Well, that doesn’t mean that I hunt for harmonious thoughts to justify my feelings... Infact, this post is dedicated to the beauty of expression and also to that sweet friend who made my day!

A day in the life of An Average Indian

2008-08-01T09:21:00.000-07:00

It’s morning time, I come from the gym and get dressed for work. I sit at the breakfast table eating the breakfast prepared by my wife, and looking at the watch.

"Is the breakfast nice?" asks my wife.
"Yes it is". I mutter, talking with the food in my mouth.

I really couldn't care less if I were eating just plain bread. For my eyes are on the watch, and I just don't have the time to savor the food. Breakfast for me is not something to be enjoyed by me; it is something to be gulped down before rushing to the office. I come down, start my scooter (Yes, buddy, I still use a scooter) and it splutters to life. I hit the road now, weary of what lies ahead for me. I am living in the Hi Tech city of Bangalore, but I find that the roads and traffic here are anything but that. I have to dodge the buses belching out their poisonous fumes, and when they stop, we lesser denizens have to halt behind them, until the kings of the road move ahead. Apart from the buses I have to dodge the pedestrians who seem to enjoy playing a game called dodge me on the road, the cattle which seem to stroll blissful of the traffic around. And so I rush, at a rapid pace, in a race with other office goers like me, all hurrying in an urban version of the Grand Prix. Come to think of it, if every Indian who lives in a city were sent for Formula I racing, we would easily dominate it, considering the way we drive.

In the mad rush of life, I don't even seem to notice anything on the roads. Sundry writers advise people like us to appreciate the small and beautiful things of life. Sure, buddy, provided we have the time! Half of our time is spent in trying just to survive. I am sure even all those writers don't have the time either. Well another usual day at the office, the usual gossip, back biting and the bosses breathing down our neck to finish things on time. Deadlines and meetings, discussions that's what has become a staple of our life. Fortunately in the office we occasionally do have a chance to have impromptu discussions on other topics too, especially when the boss is away. So thank god for small mercies.

I again hit the road late in the night, fortunately traffic is not too heavy and I drive at a more leisurely pace. I come to my apartment, and the lift is not working again for the umpteenth time. Many meetings, fights, complaints have been given regarding this yet the lift keeps stopping regularly, taking a break whenever it feels like. The lift guys blame the apartment owners, the owners blame the mechanics, every one point fingers at others, but ultimately the lift still keeps breaking down. Well I guess the ultimate blame lies with the people in the apartment, for I have seen them not closing the door properly many a time. So much for our education that doesn't even teach basic responsibilities. I trudge all the way up to the fifth floor where I stay, and I reach the top, and goes off the power supply. The current department in our area, deems it fit to remove the current whenever it feels like doing so, but that doesn't prevent them from dumping astronomical bills on us when its time to pay. Wonder where all that money is going.

My wife lights a candle for me, and I switch on the tap only to find there is no water running from it. I ask her what has happened, and she replies that the pump is under repair. It's hot and sweltering, and here I am faced with a double whammy of power cut and no water. People imagine that we folks who stay in apartments lead luxurious lives, if only they could come and see. I get frustrated and ask her not to pay the water bill this month. I know it’s in vain, because come first week of the month, I pay it dutifully. Thankfully there is some water there so I have a bath and feel refreshed a bit. But the power is yet to come, so my wife and I settle down for a candle light dinner. It has been quite a frequent occurrence in my place, so guess we can thank the current department for providing a little bit of romance in our lives! The power comes on, and the TV is on also. I surf on the channels to see what's up. Every other channel seems to have a serial running where the entire characters look, talk, thinks, and walk alike, only they speak in different languages. I switch to a music channel, and I don't know which one is an Ad and which one is a song, all seem the same to me. I switch to a movie channel, and I see an old favorite Hindi movie of mine playing. Ah thank god I say, as an interesting scene comes up, but before, I can even savor that experience, a dozen advertisements pop up on the screen, and put me off. So what to do, nothing just relax with my wife, tell her what happened in the office and go to sleep, hoping against hope that next day would be better.

This goes on forever though it is utterly boring, empty and dull. An average Indian lives his life with only the hope of a better tomorrow.

About having a social life . . . . . or not: D

2008-07-02T08:00:00.000-07:00

So here I am minding my own business and getting on with my life when here comes along a certain fellow humanoid and pops up a most absurd question, and may I add, most randomly too.

"Are you actually this anti-social or does it just appears that way to me?"

Me : * blink*

This sudden in-your-face question coming from someone I'd met just a few days back, left me (to say the least) absolutely bewildered and at a complete loss for words. My first reaction was to shoot back at him with a "so why are you stalking me again?" but instead I just politely smiled it away. Although I was pretty much aware of the nature of relationships/connections between me and the rest of the teenaged creatures I had been fortunate or unfortunate enough to meet, I'd never actually given a serious thought to the 'state of my social life.' Then it struck me that even before I could set out on examining my 'social life’, I first needed to know what it meant in the first place. No I didn't rush to the mighty Oxford dictionary or the mighty Wikipedia but chose instead to comfortably settle down on my bean bag with a cup of coffee, a few cookies and a thought for the evening~ Is Supra anti-social?

First test- Going by the definitions of a 'social life' in corny soap operas and glossy teen magazines.
Case - People with ever sparkling hair and shoes who have dedicated every waking hour to the 'noble and heroic mission' of attending every single party of drugs, drink and smoke. You can also throw in a few funky cars, a beach house and a mindless but good-looking boyfriend/girlfriend to decorate the arm.
Result - FAILED. By that definition I can gladly proclaim myself to be anti-anti-anti-anti-anti social.

Second test - Face book and other social networking websites.

1) Do I dutifully log in atleast 5 times a day?
Ans. No

2) Do I have the entire human population on my 'friends list'
Ans. Actually, far from it. So, no.

3) Do I have an albums loaded with pictures of me and my friends?
Ans. Forget albums. Haven't even bothered to put up one single picture. It's against my general policy to put up photographs. Again, no.

4) Do I spend my time on the apparently popular applications like 'compare people' or 'rate your friends' and categorize people like boxes.
Ans. Trash! The only application I actually like is stickers. Others are just pure waste of time.

5) Do I have a wall or scrapbook overflowing with posts?
Ans. No

6) Do I even need to proceed with this test?
Ans. No : P

Result - FAILED. Oh well . . . so by those standards, I guess I am anti-social.

Third Test - School, Other classes and Beyond.
In comparison to other real life people, I don't party every weekend or go out often for lunches or dinners after classes or any such sort. It's not like I am against any of these things, it’s just that I personally don't like parties unless it's only with the really close and special friends. Nor do I usually engage myself in class gossip during free time. It's terribly boring. Nor am I too often on the net or phone.

*declaredly stamps an anti-social *: D

Now eventually comes the question . . . ~why this foolish and lunatic behavior?

Hmmm. . . .

Maybe,
1) I love my private space too much
2) I love myself too much : D
3) Probably the present surroundings and circumstances tend to bring out the introvert side of me.
4) I only like bonding with few selected special people rather than 'generally' passing time with anyone and everyone.
5) I'm too busy or occupied with other things.
6) Or I'm just too lazy
7) or it's all of the above.

Anyways, I have a few close friends, beyond that I don't take too much effort or go out of my way to mix unless I genuinely like someone because usually I can figure out people in the first conversations itself and after that not too many get past the first few.
And regardless of how corny or cliché this may sound but I only believe in proper true real friendship and stuff like that or nothing at all. I'm not capable of applying the 'time pass' or 'use and throw' theory with people in any sort of relationship.

Moral of the story – Supra Biyani is the type that likes to curl up with a book by the lamp side on a Saturday evening or just cuddle up with people she really likes and watch some good movie.

Now whether that makes me an anti-social or an introvert or a boring person or anything of that sort in the eyes of the society, I don’t know.

Perception of Life

2008-05-15T02:02:00.000-07:00

I didn’t try and understand it, it just came my way, didn’t even opt for it, just got noticed, a wave in the ocean, where every drop is unknown to the other, a particle of dust on a busy street, shifting places by someone else's will.

So what have I all got at the end of the day, tears for myself or pity for the pie, Who knows, today here, with a flickering image of humanity and tomorrow, in a world of absurdity, fully complicated, this concept of life, made by none, perceived my many, controlled by wish and executed by desire.
Just a game with time, clicking into the infinity, will never know, when the clock stops ticking, will never know why the clock stopped ticking, been here, done what , been there, seen what , I don’t see things the way they are, don’t believe them the way they are told about.

See them right through their heart, perceive them the way I want, free them all to the world to care, imagine, to stare and wish. It’s such a beautiful life. Neither me made it, nor you, still we accept it, don’t want to mend it, leave it untouched and unharmed, wandering through the mazes of darkness to find the light, ignorant of it being left right behind.

So ultimately its a circle, who cares, neither me, nor you, read this and think, maybe abuse, maybe comment, maybe hack, maybe die, maybe live, how does it all matter, Honestly, it does not.

The Wonder Years

2008-04-11T00:06:00.000-07:00

I sit back to think about the wonders of Teenage life. But where are the wonders I am talking about. I cannot find much in my life as of now! Today’s teens represent one of the most confused, non-understanding, of incoherent reflection, totally devoid of passion a decadent age which flies into a rage of swirling enthusiasm a moment only to decline back into its carefully chosen state of natural indolence-this is what most teens are all about, but I am sure there are many expectations to it.12 experiments pending in chemistry, three in physics and five in biology! Need to complete all the assignments in ACE, prepare for the tests on organic chemistry, calculus, and binomial theorem. And this is what the teenager calls life and seems to ‘enjoy’ every moment because nothing will back again. Then comes the false pretensions of being a ‘responsible’ parent who not only claim to not only understand you but also you psychology. If you listen some other person other than your parents they pull long faces and if commit the heinous crime of living life the way YOU want and start expressing your views, you are definitely outcast for life. So where do one go in times of need? Most parents are so busy with they ‘bust’ life that they hardly get time for their children unless he has done something shameful or else the will say “We too went through the same phase. I don’t recall having any such problems. The problem with this generation of yours is that you people are materialistic, selfish and utterly immature.” If they really did, then why on earth don’t they remember what it was like? If they DO remember (and so they claim) then why are they acting so grown up all the time, and making us feel miserable? They were either angels straight from heaven or they are pretty good at writing at writing fairy tales. WE have to shine like stars academically as well as do brilliantly in everything we try. Sometimes I wonder why not dispose of kids and hire well programmed robots instead. They would be much less trouble and complain.

I wasn’t born just to create havoc; neither do we want to purposefully antagonize people. I am perfectly normal, but for my parents I am a rebellious young wart. The other day some one asked me-“why do you crib so much? And you just accept things as they are and move on with life?” Haven't we all forgotten the importance of living? Real Living! Where we can enjoy each moments of our life and take the good and the bad in its own stride. Aren't we all, too much into trivial matters and petty thinking and driven by insatiable greed? I could not answer him and kept thinking about it all through the day. That day it was raining the whole day and yes somehow I was at peace within my self and thought did low marks in tests, people making all false rumors about you, pimples on your face, a sleepless night, fights and arguments with parents and friends, the unavailability of latest gadgets and shoes in town, a hectic day, bother one so much?? Think again…

The little things are what life is all about. Search your soul and lean to appreciate and value those small things. Like a beauty of sunset, the time spent with loved ones, walk along the beach, the warmth and safety of your home. Counting you blessing makes life easier. The wonder moments of teenage life are the ones that take your breath away for the rest of our lives and we are suppose to enrich our lives through memories and experiences of both good and bad so that we have something valuable to cherish later in life and learn some tough lesson of life too. . We ‘r human beings and am bound to make errors, You and me both have made mistakes in life the smarter one is who has managed to learn from it. I do have memories to live by, live unto, to live for. Be it the memorable schooldays or the sweet and bitter teenage, they are all gone in a jiffy! Probably these wont be the best years of life not that I expect them to be but yes I will definitely have some memories to cherish. Very often I have heard things like one should enjoy adolescent days to the fullest…but aren’t these the crucial days that lay the foundation of our lives. Adventurous teenage can be even difficult, hurtful, even dangerous but if one survives it one is left with the wonder moments forever. We slog all our school life hopping to be termed ‘successful’ some day! But aren’t we forgetting that is lot more to life that being the topper in school examinations? Isn’t the concept of enjoyment lost somewhere midway? Today if you scored 99% in board examination or you are good at everything you try your hand at, then Congratulations you have just been declared successful by the society. Success is relative term, it is achieving what you set out to achieve. If each one of us just realized one fact… one stark fact, that Perhaps we live but once, life would have been a better journey. What today will be like is up to me. I get to choose what kind of life I will have!
Why Not Make It A Memorable and Worthwhile Day!?!?!?!

I walk out of memory lane with the realization that today has to be lovely, because, today is going to be memory tomorrow too. And I’d probably want to cherish these moments someday! Neither rewind nor forward stay in the present and fantasize over the simple joys in our lives that take our breath away! Sing your song, dream your dreams, hope your hopes and pray your prayers. Don't let anyone to steal your dreams. Follow your heart, no matter what. Try it and ignite your wandering ideas. Simple truths and facts are timeless. It's only the half-truths guided by external realities that change.

People have asked me to do this 'about me' tag....So here goes!!

2008-04-10T09:10:00.000-07:00

Nine things you wish you could say to people right now (don’t take names)

1) I’m human and am bound to make errors.
2) You cannot judge me in half an hour.
3) You’re annoying. {Any guesses who this is for? ;)}
4) Stop being such a wannabe, be yourself, and for heaven’s sake think for yourself.
5) I am NOT trying to act smart. You are just too narrow-minded to understand!!
6) Stop telling me to learn diplomacy. I want to be ME. And I am NOT diplomatic.
7) Please leave me alone, I can do things by myself...
8) Don’t I deserve a chance to prove myself?
9) I love you!

Eight things about yourself:

1) Many a little thing upsets me greatly, and I can't really help that.
2) I’m curt and will probably end up saying everything in-your-face.
3) I’m vegetarian; I don't drink or smoke.
4) I like people. And I don't normally care if they like me too....I like talking to them,watching them....its good fun, though I guess the 'people' don't like it so much!
5) I prefer writing something to delivering a speech to a large audience. When it comes to people who are actually close to my heart, I get tongue tied...so I’d rather write!
6) I am very finicky about people touching me. I can get really rude if someone whom I don’t like suddenly grasp my arm or comes too close, adults in special. That apart, I love a warm hug or a pat on the back...

7) I really hate messy people and dirty surroundings.
8) I am a very sensitive person, but on the outside I act bonkers!!

Four things I want to do before I die:

1) Visit a hundred countries.
2) Prove that I am am worth a lot!!
3) Teach at least 10 kids how to read, write and speak English. More than 10, hopefully! I have already started with 2.
4) Find the perfect man!! : P
5) Mean the world to someone.

Five Turn Offs:

1) Fake Accents (especially the so-called US Accent), Pseudo People, Bad Grammar. Anything that clearly shouts that you're trying to be something you're not.
2) Sarcasm
3) Wannabes.
4) Ppl hu tink dis is kewl.
5) Know-it-all attitude.
6) Bitching about people behind their backs.
7) People not looking at me when being talked to
8) Show- off's
9) Pessimism
10) People trying to be something they aren't!!

Five turn on’s

1) People being frank.
2) Being open-minded
3) People full of energy, always ready for something
4) Wit
5) A great sense of humor.

Four things you wish you never did

1) Taken grade 11 for granted and fared miserably!! :(
2) Yelled at people close to me for no fault of theirs.
3) Gotten all worked up and cried over trivial issue, all to myself...
4) Been naive and let people take advantage of me!!

Six things that cross your mind a lot

1) When I'd be able to ride a bike!!
2) School or my recent lack of it!
3) Recent books that I liked
4) Feminism...
5) Why do I get affected so much by idiotic criticism?
6) How life will be post 12th

One way to win my heart (there’s just one):
Be honest with me, even if it sounds rude....and take me as I come...accept the entire package and my heart is won over!

Think for Yourself

2008-04-02T03:21:00.000-07:00

“Don’t make tragedies of trifles, Don’t shoot butterflies with rifles”.

Can you imagine someone running after a butterfly with a rifle in his hands? Won’t such stupidity make you burst out laughing? But wait. Stop and consider how often you might have done something similar.

Many of us are like the fabled hen, Henny-Penny. She lived in a forest with many other animals and birds. But she excelled in making tragedies of trifles!! One fine, sunny morning, she was busy scratching the ground for worms and grubs. Suddenly she let out a frightened cackle and scampered, wings flapping in fear. A dry leaf had fluttered down on her, but she went squawking at whoever she met, “Run, run for your lives, the sky is falling.” The other birds and animals left off whatever they were doing. Some ran helter-skelter behind Henny-Penny, shrieking warnings with her, while others scattered in different directions spreading the unfounded story that the sky was falling.

We have all come across people like this hen. They turn a flimsy rebuff into an unpardonable, punishable affront; a dog barks and they raise a hue and cry as if bitten by it; a classmate may pull a harmless prank on them but they and their parents will try to bring the school down in retaliation. Two sneezes and they drive the family frantic with their moans and groans. In such minds, a strong wind takes on the dimensions of a tornado and sadly they react as if to a twister.

The rest of us are like the other foolish creatures who did not stop to verify the truth for themselves. We make ourselves gullible to rumors and conmen. It is little wonder that people not only flock to see idols drinking milk, they also pick up weapons and stones at the drop of a hat. They shoot butterflies with rifles. They just will not think for themselves. They shelve commonsense somewhere in the attic of their minds and allow predatory spiders to weave their webs in them. Unfortunately, many don’t clean those mental cobwebs forever and a day.

Why don’t people think for themselves? Often because of mental apathy as also because they do not want to be responsible for their way of thinking, the ensuing behavior and the consequences of their actions. It is always so easy to blame it on elders, ‘them’, scriptures, politicians and everybody else. Are you amongst those who abdicate good sense to people ever eager to capture the minds of others? Don’t let your mind be enslaved by someone else. Stop, Think, Ascertain and then go ahead. Let these be the signals that direct you at every crossroad of life.

Walking through life with the mind relinquished is more dangerous than crossing a busy road with eyes closed. That does not mean we follow another extreme and rebel at every turn in our lives. Our thoughts should lead us to speak and act in ways conducive to our own good and that of the society at large. They should lead us towards the light of wisdom and sense, not away from it into darkness. Our thinking should be high, raising us to the ranks of the sensible. Let us not follow blindly the trends of fashion, life-styles, ideologies or precepts. We have been blessed with reasoning, discerning, sensitive minds. Let us make use of these faculties and be the masters of our own minds.

A Perfect Life ...

2008-03-15T02:30:00.000-07:00

Last evening the discussion with one of my friends gave food for thought.
For some reason she was quite irritated and frustrated with her life! Thinking about
One of our common friends who had almost everything one could desire (or so it seemed!), she told me she wished she too could have a perfect life.

This sentence made me ponder as to what a “perfect” life could mean?

My dear friend replied that if she had “such and such” thing her life would be perfect….

And I guess that is what we all think. Don’t we? And when we attain “that” we have a new “such and such” thing that could make our life perfect!

In this cycle of attaining something we ignore our present and that too with no regrets!

How wonderful our lives could be if we realize that our life is NOT going to be perfect rather we would have to find perfection in what we have right now and truly start enjoying the moment rather than wanting it to be something else!

Life could be perfect if we start learning to love life while it is too hot outside; there is too much pollution in air or too many mosquitoes around…

There’s something positive in every situation. The magic perhaps, is to identify it.

Often I was told that happiness is relative. Some find it in the worst of situations, while for some nothing is good enough. Life, being the two sides of the same coin, is charged with negative and positive energies. The more optimistic we are the more good comes our way; the better we are prepared for the unpleasant situations in our life. It builds within us that strength of character required to visage all the challenges life hurls at us from time to time. Develops our imperiousness towards the objectionable in our life. On the other side, the negative energies make us doubt everything that happens around us, sometimes our own abilities and worthiness. The gluttony, anger, anguish and the depression envelops all the good within us in darkness.

It was there in the morning sun, in the sleepy smile of a child, the petals of a new flower in my kitchen flower pot, the aroma of my coffee, the cool breeze that kissed my face, the simple hug of my loved ones, waking next to the man I love, the satisfaction of having lived another worthwhile day………

Remember to pack this in your bag : Patience

2008-02-08T23:15:00.001-08:00

For those wishing to visit India, one of the main thing they need to pack with them is plenty of patience. The eternal queues, endless paperwork, triple copies of all forms, crowds, endless traffic... living with all of this requires endless patience.

Everyone in India seems to want to try your patience. The street hawker will bargain with you till you are blue in the face. And all this for a few rupees ! The whiney beggar will follow you until you either give him some money or abuse ! The auto rickshaw driver will play Russian Roulette on streets over crowded with people, animals and vehicles of various size and speed. You can not feel any more secure in a car - the driver will insist on playing Chicken Run with an over-loaded lorry on a road narrowed by roadwork. There is no peace in the temples either. Priests and devotees alike insist on loudly ringing brass bells at all hours of the day. Loud "devotional" music blares out of loud speakers from temples, mosques, and film/ pop music blares out of every pan shop.

You need patience for crossing the roads, where no man made law rules - only the eternal law of self preservation and survival guarantees any chance of getting through. Footpaths are virtually non-existent on most through fares. Where such a facility exists, it is more often than not taken over by hawkers, beggars, shanty dwellings and the ubiquitous cows. Navigating the roads of India is an art form and an entire documentary series could be made on the finer points of "Survival on the hostile terrain of the Indian road system".

Everywhere you go, you are forever surrounded by people. Even in the remoter parts of the country, life engulfs you. In the houses, friends, family and house servants are forever present. Outside, life of all description assails you from all directions. Even in the villages and hamlets of India, you cannot escape the constant scrutiny of men and beasts. You are forever being observed. Not just because you are an outsider, but because many people have nothing better than to stare ! People are forever discussing the comings and goings of their neighbors and their neighbors' neighbors !! Animals have caught on this habit. Cows, buffaloes and even dogs stare. Apart from barking at night, dogs enjoy laying in the middle of the road and staring at all drivers who force them to get up and vacate that warm spot on the tarmac.

I can now understand why Indian Rishies recommended patience as an essential virtue. Even our Gods and Goddesses hold up their hand and ask us to wait and be patient. Indeed, the queues are often greatest in India's temples ! Everyone want so appease the Gods. Someone wants a better job, a wife, a son, win the lottery or simply want to be "seen" at a temple because it is fashionable to be at that particular temple ! Indeed, it is a status symbol in certain circles, and the best of the best will dress up in traditional grab to pay their humble respects to the divine

Of course, nothing is more divine than money. In a nation that takes pride in the likes of Buddha, Mahavir and Mahatma Gandhi, money is forever the main topic of conversation. Everyone is thinking of getting rich and rich quickly. Corruption is still an ever present problem. Wheels of government are still greased by wades of money. Most of the politicians are accused of corruption, murder, sleaze and thuggary. Dressed in simple, rough, hand spun clothes, this new class of our rulers is becoming more and more adept at sucking money from every pore of it’s masses. It doesn't matter if it’s a large military contract or a massive aid for emergency fodder for cattle, they will sponge as much as they can out of this.

Unfortunately, politicians are not the only ones. Sadly, most of our saffron clad monks are also involved in flaying us for lining their pockets. While the masses of India find it difficult to keep a tin roof over their head, many so called monks live in marble palaces with solid gold wash basins and silken robes. When the populace is hemmed in on one side by greedy rulers and even greedier clergy, how can they escape this atmosphere of greed?

Don't get me wrong, I love India and think it is a great country with an even greater potential, but, it requires a lot of patience to discover this greatness.

LIFE ..

2008-01-02T22:40:00.000-08:00

As I Walk Through Life ...

I've learned-
that it's taking me a long time to
become the person I want to be.

I've learned-
that we are responsible for what we do,
no matter how we feel.

I've learned-
that either you control your
attitude or it controls you.

I've learned-
that heroes are the people who do what has to
be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I've learned-
that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I've learned-
that one should keep his words both soft and tender,
because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

I've learned-
that you can do something in an instant
that will give you heartache for life.

I've learned-
that true friendship continues to grow,
even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.

I've learned-
that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences
you've had and what you've learned
from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.

I've learned-
that no matter how good a friend is, they're going
to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned-
that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others,
Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I've learned-
that it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

I've learned-
that life is not "give and take”, it is "give and get".
What you give same you get in return.

I've learned-
that our background and circumstances may have
influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who
we become, because we always have choices in life.

I've learned-
that regardless of the relationship I share
With my parents I will miss them When they're gone from your life.

I've learned-
that two people can look at the exact same thing
and see something totally different.

I've learned-
that credentials on the wall do not make you a human being.

I've learned-
that Excess of everything is bad.

I've learned-
that the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to
surround myself with people smarter than I am.

I've learned-
We learn to say yes and No at an early age for a reason- utilize those two words for all they are worth.

I've learned-
Don’t worry about things that are unsolvable- you aren’t meant to solve them.

I've learned-
Only tell people things that you want to tell them- some things are meant to be kept private.

I've learned-
Be who you want to be- and not what somebody else wants you to be.

Never say "I Can't" say "I Will Try" and then give it your best....

A Great Day!

2007-12-03T02:06:00.000-08:00

I wake up early today, excited over all
I have responsibilities to fulfill today.
I am important.
My job is to choose what kind of day I am going to have.

Today I can complain because the weather is rainy...
or I can be thankful that the grass is getting watered for free.

Today I can grumble about my health...
or I can rejoice that I am alive.

Today I can mourn my lack of friends...
or I can excitedly embark upon a quest to discover new relationships.

Today I can whine because I have to go to work...
or I can shout for joy because I have a job to do.

Today I can murmur dejectedly because I have to do housework...
or I can feel honored because,
Life has provided shelter for my mind, body, and soul.

Today... stretches ahead of me,
waiting to be shaped.
And here I am, the sculptor who gets to do the shaping.

What today will be like is up to me.
I get to choose what kind of day will have!
Why Not Make It A Great Day?!?!?!

Slang is 'cool'!

2007-11-05T08:03:00.000-08:00

I was a silent spectator to three interesting scenarios. Let me present these to you.

The first was on an evening, when I had watched a good movie, and was walking out of the theatre, with my thoughts resting on the movie. Behind me, a group of college students talked animatedly, and these were the lines that caught my attention: ‘It was wow!’…. ‘Amazing!’…. ‘She was cool’….I strained my ears to hear more, but apparently, they had decided to abandon the movie and move on to ‘plans for tomorrow’.

The second scenario took me to lines from an e mail which reads: ‘Shez in my cllg. She sucks. Ppl wid sum thgt wud nvr do this. Wht say, Supz?’Do I need to translate? :) (i dont like even my name mutilated to supz instead of supra too).

The third scenario came in a little while later. By then, I had attuned myself to this new dictionary, whose vocabulary was along the lines of ‘amazing’, ‘cool’, ‘rocks’, ‘sucks’, and the likes that we so affectionately categorize as slang. A book is cool, your trip was cool, new attire is cool, the weather is cool, and you are cool! And if you still speak conventional English, you are not so cool!So, the third scenario. My little cousin walked up to me and proudly held out a poem he had written. I read it, and it was brilliant for a boy who was only twelve. Just as I was silently celebrating this rare joy of re-discovering good language, my cousin asked me- ‘It’s cool na?’ And then added- ‘Oh, screw the poem. Aren’t you coming with us?’ I gave up.

The use of slang and substitutes for words of profound meaning is another reflection of our changing times and the increasing malady of ADD (Attention Deficiency Disorder).Most of us whose attention is limited and therefore have a limited vocabulary who have coined slang like these to make their deficiency sound ouch.... so cool. I can't speak for the world, but I for one prefer to be 'not so cool' and stick to the Queen's English, though Mark Twain, all those years ago said, 'There is no such thing as Queen's English. It is a public limited company and we hold the major shares'!!! Most of us are using slang in everything we describe whether it makes sense or not (the movie was nice, the book was cool, the chick was sexy, color was cool or even sexy). It is a trend... to be ‘cool’, but we are mutilating the beautiful language.Well, ask the youth of today about their thoughts on slang, and they will tell you that slang is not inferior to good, conventional English. It is just different. More importantly, it is cool! I have no issues on slang, my dear friends, but for slang to replace good conventional English, is a calamity!

Of all the skills that man has been endowed with, language is perhaps one of the most potent, when it comes to expression and reaching out.Language is not a tool to be pushed to the court of writers and literature students; it is an essential element of all our lives- be it domestic life, professional life, or social life. It is an element that nourishes the soul.Words are but stories of our lives, and of our experiences on this planet. It is for us to breathe life into each of these words, and leave footprints of our souls onto this planet.As life takes us through its experiences, we feel an inherent need to make sense of these experiences, and to express the essence of our conclusions. And what better tool can serve these needs, than that of language?Ironically, modes of communication are expanding at an exponential rate, while language is progressively finding its way to the grave!

Let me tell you that the moment you feel you have done at least some justice to the depth of language, is when you realize that the seven synonyms of a word do not exactly mean the same, and when you refuse to substitute one for the other….when you refuse to use ‘beautiful’, ‘wonderful’, ‘good’, ‘lovely’ and ‘amazing’ synonymously….while slang groups it all into ‘cool’!

The Journey From Creation to Creator

2007-10-26T23:54:00.000-07:00

In a train chugging along parallel tracks of steel, negotiating mountainous tunnels now and vast plains then or in a plane competing with clouds for altitude or just like a pilgrim trudging along, carrying one’s own solitude while brooding over the milestones and destinations, we must have met one another on a number of occasions, now of course conveniently confined to the inaccessible recesses of memory. We must have called on a number of ports and stopped at a number of wayside inns enroute this voyage of ours - sometimes labeled as life. And yet at some other times we must have found ourselves simply gazing at it with amazement. It is also quite possible that we might have found ourselves simply dumbfounded and puzzled at some turns and crossings along this path that defied all explanations.

Traveling along a path or just wandering like a cloud in the sky, did we ever wonder at the trees in silent meditation, the patterns drawn by breeze on the unending sands or the continuous conversation going on between the waves and the banks of a river? Our journey makes us negotiate many turnings, countless crossroads, innumerable ups and downs but yet it seems that after every event, which appears like a concluding event, something still remains to be done.

Is this all coming and going, rushing and jostling entirely a matter of compulsion imposed on us? Willingly or unwillingly, while participating in this phenomenon that we call life, do we ever make a serious attempt at reaching the goal having some semblance of a lasting achievement?

Can we really reach a destination from where there is no proceeding further?
Is a destination the only destiny of a journey? Is our goal a milestone only?

It is quite possible that these questions might not have been faced by most of us because we never care to pause enroute our daily waking and sleeping and our never-ending efforts at earning something either monetarily or socially.
The beginning and end of this journey, along the path of which we come to discover ourselves, lies in seeking the force that makes all this possible because only that is the destination, which neither turns into a milestone on reaching it, nor does it elude us on seeking it. The force that makes it possible for you and me to share these thoughts through these words is the same force that makes it possible for the trees to meditate be they in a jungle of concrete or a verdant forest along the foothills and also it is the same force again that makes it possible for the river to chart its own course, from mountain peaks to sandy beaches, reaching to lose itself in the embrace of ocean.

Provided one is willing to acknowledge, one cannot help but experience the vibrant presence of this force in silence and in symphony, in stillness and in movement, in calmness of oasis and waves of ocean, in glowing horizon and in darkened skies, in folding and unfolding of a flower to and from a seed and everywhere and anywhere wherever one tends to perceive.
Is it imperative that we name this force? For convenience of dialogue maybe, we can call it the ‘creator’ and whatever we have been talking, thinking, writing, visualizing etc. could be named as the ‘creation’. By assigning these two terms do we tend to talk about two different entities having independent existence akin to an artist and the painting?

Can we visualize colors and canvas as distinct entities in a work of art?
Where does the seen exist in a scene? Is there is a distance that separates the two? How far is the creator really away from the creation?

The path that we had been traversing since the time we knew about ourselves has accompanied us all through but beginning somewhere in this creation is there a path that we must traverse before reaching the creator? We had been to a number of milestones and some destinations too. But in the garb of finality all of them presented a facade never-ending uncertainty.
There is only an illusory distance, a non-existent veil, and a seemingly hazy screen that appears to separate the creator from creation. It just needs one little pause to cover this distance, one look inwards to pierce the hazy screen and just a little effort by hands raised in supplication to cast this veil aside to reach the goal which is no different for the journey itself. The creating force itself is the created scene. The observer himself is the observed. The musician himself is the music.

Having come this far with me don’t you feel compelled to pause and reflect and take that little step to cover this distance between the traveler and the destination? Then taking a stride and yet remaining still, to experience the oneness that creation enjoys with the creator, how memorable, how pleasant, how exhilarating it is going to be; only you would be able to experience! Then there will be neither you nor me!

A prefect life...

2007-09-19T09:05:00.000-07:00

Last evening the discussion with one of my friends gave a lot of food for thought.
For some reason she was quite irritated and frustrated with her life! Thinking about
One of our common friends who had almost everything one could desire (or so it seemed!), she told me she wished she too could have a perfect life.

This sentence made me ponder as to what a “perfect” life could mean?

My dear friend replied that if she had “such and such” thing her life would be perfect….

And I guess that is what we all think. Don’t we? And when we attain “that” we have a new “such and such” thing that could make our life perfect!

In this cycle of attaining something we ignore our present and that too with no regrets!

How wonderful our lives could be if we realize that our life is NOT going to be perfect rather we would have to find perfection in what we have right now and truly start enjoying the moment rather than wanting it to be something else!

Life could be perfect if we start learning to love life while it is too hot outside; there is too much pollution in air or too many mosquitoes around…

There’s something positive in every situation. The magic perhaps, is to identify it.

Lets try making best out of the worst. Let’s not wait for life to be perfect and start celebrating the imperfection!

Marriage

2007-09-16T10:37:00.000-07:00

Marriage turns out to be great for a few and for most it turns out to be a night mare or just drag. Most people marry because they have attained a certain age (after this there will be no more proposals), some do so only because it a consistent social custom.A successful marriage depends on two things: ‘finding the right person and being the right person.’ Do we really know the definition of a successful marriage? We often say that someone somewhere is made for you and has been waiting for you. But later we see that due to lack of understanding they whiff apart. Everything is not like they lived happily ever after in real lives. Relationships are complex and need proper care and time. How can we say a couple was the prefect match though they did not give any effort to understand each other? So it’s important one gets to know his partner well before marriage. There are people who get physically attracted and fall for each other (doesn’t It strike to them that this pretty gal or the dude wont last till old age) and eventually end up getting married. But later on we see their wavelength not matching and they easily get separated without a second thought. It is one’s ego that usually comes between two individuals and ruins a marriage. It is true that opposites attract but marriage is not just about attraction. It is about living together with the someone for the rest of the life. It is waking up seeing the same face all your life (are we ready to do so?). So their basic habits ways of thinking and attitudes should be similar and not completely different.Marriage is not just the coming together of two individuals. There is much more to it. To sustain a marriage it is important that there is an effort from both sides. A successful marriage is like a good recipe whose main ingredients are love, commitment, understanding, concern and togetherness. Someone has aptly said, “A conversation which always seems too short”. This is so true. when we talk about mental compatibility between husband and wife we have seen that this problem not only exist in case of arranged marriages where both were unknown to each other before marriage but even in many years of courtship in love marriages this problem exits, because when we meet before marriage we are on our best behavior to impress the other person (and that’s where the actual true starts).But gradually after marriage, when we slip back into our natural selves, because in most cases the real self is not what we want to show. Then starts friction between the person one had loved and with whom one had decided to spend one’s life. So it is very important to be your real self and not pretend to be something that you are not. Love marriage or arranged, it takes two people really responsible honest and committed to succeed. Whether it's a love marriage or arranged, it needs a lot of effort to work a marriage. Getting married is a complete package. One just doesn't marry the person as such but his habits, his family, his emotional problems, his background, his experiences, his career and lot of other things that are required to be dealt with. It is normal that there shall be a few. They should be willing to give a serious thought to every argument they have and look into the cause and then ways of resolvingA happy married life calls for constant commitment and concern for each other. There are a few small but important aspects, which we tend to forget in our married lives, as we get busy with the daily chores. We start taking each other for granted. So it is important to indulge in those minute details of married life, which will constantly remind each other of the love, concern, being present. Romance is a big question in a marriage. Most marriages start with romance. However, after a while it seems to disappear. Romance is such a beautiful thing that we all want it to stay. Stay for good. You don't need flowers and chocolates to keep romance fresh. The love has to be real. When you are genuinely in love, you do things that show concern, love and caring. When you take care of your partners needs no matter whatever the conditions.Another important aspect of marriage is communication. If one cannot talk to one’s spouse, their marriage will have no room for growth. Communication builds trust as well. Its is important to maintain a good trusting marriage communication one’s feelings and needs keeps one’s marriage surving.Having a firm foundation in marriage is also important. Like a building the foundation of a marriage is what keeps it from falling apart. If the whole marriage thing is treated as if it began on the day the couple got married and got over with the ceremonies, weeding party, gifts, feasting…then there is no solution one should be prepared for a disgusting and ‘boring’ life ahead. Most people say that their marriage failed because it lacked love, trust, understanding, concern for each other. And if I say that those so-called things were never present in their marriage am not wrong because one cannot lose which wasn’t there actually.For most, the happiness of a married-life is solely dependent on performance of sex by partners. If the sex life is not good then the marriage is not a pass, sure enough! On the contrary, I feel if a marriage is not good then the sex life is not good. Unfortunately, all this has turned sex into a mere commodity which should have been a beautiful phase of one’s marriage. I feel there are a lot of misconceptions about sex especially so in Indian society. For few a beautiful sex is the start of love and for vise versa. But more and more people are marrying many times in search of good sex life – a mirage. Sexual pleasure in marriage gets matured like every other thing. Over a period of time, couples understand the needs of each other, if they pay attention and care enough. Sex like every other thing in nature has been created for a purpose. The sole purpose is evolution - the pleasure is a by-product. However, the act is pure and blissful depending of course upon the attitude of different people. Sex is very closely coupled to emotions. The studies have shown that the best sexual moments are enjoyed between married couples and not out side matrimony. "The foreplay is outside of the bedroom." I agree with Prof. Alan Rauchway, the author of "Relating" in all totality. The bottom line then comes down to love and caring in a married life. There is a distinct difference between desiring a person and needing a person. The outcome is accordingly. When two people are in love and care for each other not just for their physical needs but also the emotional, they are desired. Combined act of love then is very contented and blissful. On the other hand, if it is just a need of the body obviously the end result is just getting rid of one's confined passion. If we all attach the right values to sex, we would be happier in marriage rather than running for the mirage and making married life a mess. Like every other thing in a marriage sex is required to be worked on according to the biological needs of your partner. Let us not make our lives unhappy by making everything in our lives a business and monotony.Today most young men get married (or even otherwise) with a lot of pressure as to how they would perform or whether or not they will be able to save their marriage. In this case, the pressure in the first place is against the rules of performing well. And sure enough when people are trying to perform well rather than enjoying the act of love, they definitely do it poorly.Other things that are vital in marriage include being understanding, honest and forgiving. People, who love, are willing to forgive. They are willing to enter the shoe of the other. They do not brush the other's behavior as ridiculous. They are willing to understand as to why the other's reaction is ridiculous. They respect space and freedom of the other just like they would like theirs to be respected. They are willing to give a serious thought to every argument they have and look into the cause and then ways of resolving. People who love truly and care enough are willing to go to any extent to make life worth for each other. We all marry to live happily ever after, why do then so many marriages break down or people try searching for pleasure outside their partners? I don’t get it!!People say marriage starts with love. Do we really have to be in love to marry? People say that sex is an important part of marriage. Is it so? People say that one should marry to be more mature. Is it really so? People say it is t give birth to new life. Then why do we stop giving birth after a certain numbers of children? People say that marriage is for society’s sake. Is society more important? Some people say it is natural. Is it? Just think and wonder-why do we marry?

Life …Moments Lived in Conscious Awareness

2007-09-08T01:43:00.000-07:00

Haven't we all forgotten the importance of living? Real Living! Where we can enjoy each moments of our life and take the good and the bad in it's own stride. Aren't we all, too much into trivial matters and petty thinking and driven by insatiable greed? We are whizzing past life in hurried pursuits! And we have in the process, lost out in the holistic meaning of life!! In the pursuit of the unattainable, driven by an acquisitive attitude we loose out in the meaning of real living and do not enjoy and cherish what we have with in our grasp.

It is always a different world order that we are looking for be it politically, socially or economically. But never the one we exist in. The grass seems to be greener always on the other side. Like what Lin Yutang says "The world is pretty much like an a la carte restaurant where every body thinks the food the next table has ordered is so much more delicious and inviting than his own." In the process we lose out in the real joy of eating and enjoying our own palate. We keep on looking over the shoulders and wondering how the other person must be savoring his dishes, how much more he must be enjoying.

In the pursuit of the ideal, man forgets that the ideal is always unreachable and unattainable. It is nothing but a situation that beckons and lures from distance but when it is attained and becomes a reality, that reality has it's own troubles and problems to overcome. When the ideal becomes a reality it looses its charm. It is just like the horizon once you reach it; it changes. There is always another horizon beyond the horizon. So the ideal is something that changes with the acquisition of it. And then, one aspires for another ideal. Every situation in life is a package deal of good and the bad. And however much one tries to filter out the bad, it always trickles in.

To aspire is not bad but to drive those aspirations to take the form of greed is certainly detrimental, to be more precise not conducive to mental health and joyous living. Greed brings in too much of strife in our life and is the cause of many ills our society faces today. It makes us into mechanized and driven humans running after goals without any compassion in our hearts. See what greed for power did to Hitler! It made him into a heartless monster to the point that he could not even comprehend his own well being in the end. I wonder how much of life he enjoyed within the bunker of his, feeling safe from the world. Well ultimately nobody had to kill him, he committed suicide and it was all his own doings which took him to that point. That was an extreme case but don't we all see our very own Hitlers in real life. People driven by one form of greed or another that they don't even stop to see and grasp the beauty of a flower blooming or a bird chirping. They are forever busy manipulating and maneuvering situations to their advantage. Well they loose out on the day-to-day joys of living. I wonder how many people have really noticed the beautiful Jacaranda trees in full bloom in the city of Shillong at the moment. Did anyone stop, to look at them? The color is soothing and its beauty brings in a sense of tranquility. A relief from the daily strives and endeavors of life. It works as a soothing balm but only when we are observant and alive to our surroundings. Or perhaps when we make the time or take out time, from our daily busy-ness of life to observe it.
I have seen people having enough money or perhaps more than they require for their next two or three generations and yet they do not stop at that. They keep on going, acquiring more with a single-minded dedication of having more. They are so busy and preoccupied, that they can't enjoy the luxuries of their home, forever globe trotting from one city to another. The pleasures of having home-made food, they do not know what flowers are blooming in their garden, they cannot experience their child's first smile, the first word he uttered or how he tumbled after he took his first step. These are simple source of pleasures of life, which gives immense joy but such joys are to be experienced to be felt. Like plain simple leisure sometimes… lying outside on a cold winter morning with soothing winter sun on your back. Counting the stars on a warm summer night and a wish following a shooting star. Seeing a bird perched on a branch, giving a love call to it's mate, or just throwing pebbles in a still lake and seeing the waves created in rings spreading out and disappearing… into the stillness of the lake. Somewhere on the horizon the clouds collecting on a hot summer afternoon and there is hope that the rains would come. Or after dull and dreary three four days of continuous rain, mud and slush, the sun peeps out from behind the clouds and a beautiful rainbow reflects the glory and the color of the sun. These are the simple joys of living which we miss out on in the hectic busy city life, where we are made more busy by our acquisitive desires rather then needs. Where square elongated structures blocks our views of nature, where instead of the stars at night we are counting down to 9 pm when "Kaun Banega Crorepati" would be aired. It only helps to hype our blood pressure more and is unhealthy for the heart, rather than the soothing soft breeze which flicks our hair around… or a sight of a shooting star that gives hope or rainbow which promises a brighter day ahead. They do not give us false promises… just hope and a sense of good feeling that lingers on, in our being, soothing our nerves.

Philosophers and thinkers have wrecked their brains trying to understand life, looking for mysteries and answers. But what is life really all about? Isn't it living out our minutes and seconds everyday, day after day? Retrospect and you will see it is just that. So why not make the most of it, never forgetting to cherish and enjoy what we have with in our reach and at the same time thriving to make it better in our today and with in our means. Never stretching it to the point that we snap. Anything that is stretched far beyond it's capacity to, has to snap and break. The higher we try to go, remember that a peak always comes from where it will be a longer way downhill. And what does really matter in life is that ultimately mortality has a way to humble us. And perhaps we created a soul to satisfy our own urge of immortality. The theories of what happens beyond death are certainly debatable. We have been handed down the ages, a lot of concepts, but then they are still debatable. The only thing we are sure of is our life on this earth. This is a palpable truth. And what we make of it, is in our hands. Live it with love or hate with optimism or pessimism…. Our choice. And as the saying goes, "So shall u reap as u sow" to a greater extent we will receive what we give to life.

I have seen people driven by greed, lust, and hatred to the point that they are forever entangled in litigations and hostility. And the point of dispute could be as ridiculous as perhaps a disputed piece of only a foot of land or a boundary wall, which has encroached a few inches inside. But they would not mind spending hundred times more then the worth of the object they are fighting for. And forget the amount of strife, discord and hostility that they harbor within themselves and around them. Perhaps letting go and moving on would have served them better. But do they realize that? Does it matter on the deathbed an inch more or an inch less? Does it? How much do we take with ourselves? How ironical!
Problems are a part of our life. We cannot filter out bad times. But it is our choice what we let the problems do to us. We tend to react strongly only to things which effects us negatively. Perhaps that is very humane too. We also have the tendency to downplay our blessing. And what happens is that we concentrate too much on the negative, generating negativity in us. And this is what brings us unhappiness. We cannot control the times but we can certainly control our reactions to it. It has been said that it is not the situation that matters but our reaction to it does. So it is up to us, how we let it affect us… make us bitter or better, weak or strong. Our choice. It needs nothing but a positive frame of mind that sees much beyond the pain and the suffering caused by the problems. Problems leave us wiser and stronger and they do have a brighter side to it. Like gold that burns in fire to come out pure to get it's color and brightness

We whiz past life in busy-ness and hurried pursuits, we see but we don't grasp, we sense but we don't feel. Have we ever stopped and just enjoyed the beauty of the world that surrounds us. Ever paused to listen to the sound of silence, the rustling of the leaves, the whispering of the pine trees. Or the drops of rain, falling from the heavens without bothering that our clothes would get soiled and wet. Have we ever watched the grace of the milkman as he walked up the hill with the milk cans hanging from either side of his shoulders? The smile of a beggar on the roadside pavement… Have we really observed nature of which, we are such an integral part? The rhythm of life that beats all around us coexists in all living organisms; they are pulsating with life, with beauty, with knowledge and with lessons to be learned, observing them will only help us to understand and enjoy life better.

If each one of us just realized one fact… one stark fact, that Perhaps we live but once. And in the wider scheme of things we are just one of the living organisms on this planet. We have to live in harmony with nature. Co-existence with the life force around us is the key word. May be then we can find the answers to a lot of our problems that we face today especially problems concerning our ecological balance and over drive of commercialization. Our problems started when we stopped being in harmony with nature and lost touch with our natural instincts. We are no more in tune with our deeper self and the universe. Pause for a moment… listen to the sound of silence, let time stand still for few seconds, observe the world in all it's bareness, perhaps in those few moments the symphony of life can be experienced. Follow the instincts the answers are all there within us. And if we learn to be consciously aware of the moments that we live and take into consideration the collective well being of 'life' itself, we would know the meaning of joyful living, and understand what living in harmony with the world, is all about.

Life – A Cafeteria

2007-08-06T11:21:00.000-07:00

Life's a cafeteria here. You can get anything you want as long as you are willing to pay the price. You can even get success, but you'll never get it if you wait for someone to bring it to you. You have to get up and get it yourself. Success is defined differently by different people. Most people think of success as making it big in power and money. The way I look at success is in being happy and contented not for instants but more consistently.
We grow by dreams. All big men are dreamers. Success is that way just a little after the splat. You have failed many times, although you may not remember. You fell down the first time you tried to walk. You almost drowned the first time you tried to swim. Don't worry about failure. Worry about the chances you miss when you don't even try.
Failure doesn't mean I am a failure. It does mean I have not yet succeeded. Failure doesn't mean that I have accomplished nothing it does mean I have learned something. Failure doesn't mean I have been disgraced but it does mean that I dared to try. Failure doesn't mean that I don't have it, it does mean that I have to do something in a different way. Failure doesn't mean that I have wasted my life, It does mean that I have a reason to start over. Failure doesn't mean that I should give up, It does mean that I must try harder. Failure doesn't mean that I will never make it, It does mean that I need more patience. Failure doesn't mean that you have abandoned me, It does mean You must have another idea. The secret of success is in two words -"Right decisions". And we make right decisions by our experience and we get that experience by two words-"Wrong decisions". Also people are different. Some people work well under pressure and need goals. While others just fail under pressure and are better functional in a nurturing environment. The only work ethic that works is listening to you heart as much as possible. In the end what counts is how self - referred you are i.e. your heart is telling you what to do and how to do, not somebody else or something else. That's the key. Think about the values you wish to live your life by.
The second is believe. Believe yourself based on the thinking you have done about the values you are going to live your life by.
The third is dream. Dream about the things that can be, based on your belief in yourself and values you are going to live by.
The fourth is dare. Dare to make your dreams become reality, based on your belief in yourself and your values.
And the last is attitude. The longer we live, the more we realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude is more important that facts. It is more important than past, than education, than money, then circumstances, than failure, than successes, than what other people think, say, or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill. It will make or break a company a church, a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We can't change our past. We can't change the fact that people will act in a certain way.
We can't change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is like 10% what happens and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with us and we are in charge of our attitudes. Once you reach that point in life, contentment and happiness can not be too far. And that will give you success not just in 21st century but in any century. God has equipped you for life, but HE lets you decide what you want to be. The courage must come from the soul within; you must furnish the will to win. So figure it out yourself, you were born with all the great have had. With you equipment they all began, so start for the top and say, "I can." Our future and our fate lie in our wills more than in our hands, for our hands are but the instruments of our wills. Regardless of the magnitude of the task, tackle it with all of your heart, soul and mind.
Sing your song, dream your dreams, hope your hopes and pray your prayers. Don't let anyone to steal your dreams. Follow your heart, no matter what. Focusing also works with your power of thought! Try it and ignite your wandering ideas. Simple truths are timeless. It's only the half-truths guided by external realities that change. Sticking to the eternal calling of your heart is the surest way to happiness and success. Always!